The Pillar of Flame

Hi Bill: I'd just like to encourage you to play--even if it kills you. Being an excellent musician is a process, which can often be painful because it takes forever to become good. I suggest this: forget about how you used to play and focus on how you play now. In other words, figure out what you need to do to gain control over your instrument and take action to make it happen. Here's something else that you may want to consider. It's possible that you have a treatable physiological problem that interferes with your performing. Performance anxiety can really drain a person's confidence, but there is something that can be done about it--if it's really extreme. Many musicians take a medication called propranolol, which is a beta blocker, to ameliorate the sweaty palms, racing heart beat, and rapid breathing that can be brought on during a live performance. Perhaps you could check in with a doctor about this. I'm rooting for you, man. --Matt

Hey Joe: That's a cool practice routine. Since I play a different instrument, drums, my practice regimen doesn't involve scales and chords. But I work on similar things that pertain to the drums. Stickings, for instance, are kind of like scales--they allow you to move around the kit, making different patterns. I practice those for a couple of hours a week, at least. Also, I work on rudiments all the time--but that's more out of compulsion than anything else. Here's something that you may find applicable: putting a metronome on its slowest setting and dividing into different subdivisions--that is, the "one" can be chopped up into 3, 5, 6, 7, or 9 beats. I find it challenging to solo against that single click in the different time signatures. Also, I'll set it to 20 bpm and play in double and triple time against it, alternating back and forth. Since I'm always playing fast bebop tunes with Andrew Speight, I play along with Max and Clifford's version of Cherokee everyday, as well. While I play with that tune, I try to incorporate some of the stickings that I had practiced when I was doing the metronome exercise. Cool discussion. --Matt

Hey Jim: I checked out a website that described the symptoms from Chiari Malformation Type I; it seems that you are on to something. Why are the doctors avoiding any discussion of that possibility? This must be so frustrating for you! Keep on their asses, though. Eventually, you'll get to the bottom of it all. Keep us posted, and hang in there. --Matt

Hey Alison and Jim: I'm glad to hear that you've gotten an appointment with an ENT. I can't help but think that something's irritating your cranial nerves, Alison. The weird feeling in your throat, the neck pain, vision--all of those things may possibly be connected to these twelve sets of nerves which are located in the lower area of the brain, around the brain stem. Maybe you've pinched them? Who knows? But when you go to the ENT, ask him about the nerves. He'll probably do something called an oral-mechanism exam to check them out. Anyway, here's a list of them and their functions. I – olfactory – sensory information from the nose II – optic – sensory information from the eyes III – occulomotor – control of pupil constriction and eye movement IV – trochlear – control of eye movement V – trigeminal - information from the skin of the face and tongue VI – abducens – control of eye movement VII – facial – sensory information from face, taste (front of tongue and palate), increase salivation (anterior glands), control of face muscles VIII – vestibulocochlear – sensory information from the ears (balance and hearing) IX – glossopharyngeal – taste (back of tongue), sensory/motor control of pharynx, increase in salivation (posterior glands) X – vagus – taste (throat), sensory/motor control of muscles of throat, deceleration of the heart, parasympathetic innervation of the internal organs XI – accessory – control of neck muscles XII – hypoglossal – control of tongue muscle I hope this may help in some way. I wish I were there in Michigan to bring you dinner or help you around the house . --Matt

Hey, are there any drummers out there who can help me find a Yamaha Recording Custom tom from the 80s? I'm specifically looking for one which has the teardrop-shaped single lugs. Apparently, these are really rare because I can't seem to find them anywhere! Thanks, Matt

Hey, thanks for the welcome. Anyway, I play a lot of jazz; currently, I play mostly bebop. However, I have been doing a lot of Zappa-esque stuff. If you're interested, I've got a link to a website which has some twisted stuff I recorded a while back. Here it is: www.mirthkon.com/audio/ZHAGUNK.mp3. Cheers.

...don't bring up the word (or name) Deep! I know it's painful, but we have to confront what we fear most.

They fit in most places. The compact physiques allow for easy packing and take up much less room than their full size counterparts. So how many do you take along? I'm sure that you'll need a couple to administer the duct tape onto the moose's hooves. Do they also serve the gruel to the orcs, or is that covered by Bob Barker?

So where do the midgets fit in?

Cylinder of Heat--yeah, man, I like that; it's deep.

Yup, I play drums. Do you?

No, there's no reference to Zappa. Now, for the facts--the name came from a guy who called himself The Pillar of Flame. The best part is this: he was serious. For him, it meant something important. For us, it's been a never-ending well of comedy. In fact, we've been using the phrase, The Pillar of Flame , as an interjection. Consider this use: The Pillar of Flame! That was a great concert! Translated, it means this: Son of a bitch! That was a great concert.

First, I should note that I'm not as cool as the original Pillar of Flame, a rockin' singer from a band in the Bay Area. The way he could scream and bellow out of tune, while sensously swaying his hips in an unintended polyrhythmic fashion, made me decide--right then and there--that I, too, had to be known as the Pillar of Flame. Actually, compared to the original, I should be a Pillar of Flame: that is, when it boils down to it, I'm just one of the many Pillars of Flame. There really is only one The Pillar of Flame. (When referring to the master, one must always include the article "the" before his name.) If we all give ourselves a chance to reflect on the matter, each of us will realize that we all are a Pillar of Flame. Just ask Joe--he had a chance to see the master perform. Once he witnessed that epic event, Joe discovered his own a Pillar of Flame, hidden deep within his soul. And he has never been the same since. For me, the only person who has contributed to society as much as The Pillar of Flame is the guy who advocates the use of blow-up female companions. That reminds me--does anyone have his e-mail address? I'd like to ask him if he realizes that he, too, is a Pillar of Flame--maybe The Pillar of Flame.