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Edith Sitwell Bum Phillips Uranus

Roger Mudd Walter Cronkite Dr. Krankeit

Poke Salad Annie The Jabberwock Bill Needle

Hitler Mel Brooks Eve Arden

Sonny Bono Bono Former Congressman from Tennessee's 5th District Bill Boner

Catherine the Great Mr. Ed Dick Hyman

Alan Jay Lerner Jay Presson Allen Allan Konigsberg

Johnny B. Goode William B. Williams Aunt Bee

Brother Theodore Theodore Dreiser Sister Carrie

Mindy Grayson Kathryn Grayson Dolly Parton

Emma Goldman Molly Goldberg Moll Flanders

Our shower radio has numerical volume. I will listen at 12 or 14. Never 13. This is entirely rational.

Gigli Ben Affleck The Aflac Duck

I do this with my CDs every so often, and I'm almost ready to walk inside a store again to see what I can unload. (And will donate the rest to a charity resale shop.) But the "brutal honesty with self" part is sometimes hard. There are CDs I have because I know or knew the artist, and others that come with particular memories or associations, and even though I never listen to them anymore and probably will never listen to them again before I shuffle off this mortal coil, I can't bring myself to part with them. I really should. But it feels like I'm saying "you mean nothing to me anymore."

Max Gordon Max Headroom Minnie Riperton

Bernie Knee Horton Foote Achilles

Miss Elizabeth Mapp Gerardus Mercator John Legend

Coco Chanel Willie Bobo Dodo Marmarosa

Parker Posey Rudy Valée Edsel Bryant Ford

Chuck Israels Bibi Netanyahu Moses

Queen Elizabeth I Sir Walter Raleigh Herbert Tareyton

Dave Garroway J. Fred Muggs 45

Rumpole of the Bailey Earl Butz Rear Admiral Halsey

Oliver Hardy Thomas Hardy Tess of the d'Urbervilles

Yusef Lateef Sleepy LaBeef Optimus Prime