Sir/Madam,
Your specific case has been evaluated to the required groups, and upon conscientious reflection, we are able to proffer to you the subsequent offer.
Based upon conscientious reflection you make the grade to obtain a handsome earnings on your primary property investment.
By completing the subsequent attached form in a timely manner we will be able to settle our evaluation, and we feel positive you will obtain not only a lower rate of interest, but also a cash return that will realize all your holiday needs and more!
Please go here to settle this part of the treaty.
With kindest regards,
Abdul Stephenson
Looks to me like Abdul is cribbing his form letters from Sophie. Or perhaps it's the other way around.