Funniest Thing You Ever Heard A Drunk Say

[BERIGAN]

No. He already had left for the greener pastuers of the David Lee Roth Band. The rest is history...I mean his story....

But do you know...................................................................the rest of the story?????

David Lee Roth training to become EMT

Tuesday, November 16, 2004 Posted: 9:39 AM EST (1439 GMT)

NEW YORK (AP) -- Rocker David Lee Roth, the former Van Halen frontman, is taking up a new trade.

Instead of screaming "Jump," he'll be yelling "Clear!"

Roth, 50, has been riding for several weeks with a New York ambulance crew in training to become a paramedic, The New York Post reported Tuesday.

"I have been on over 200 individual rides now," said Roth. "Not once has anyone recognized me, which is perfect for me."

The singer, who spent a decade with Van Halen before embarking on a solo career, except a collaboration with the band for two new songs on a greatest hits album, has been riding along with crews in the Bronx, Manhattan and Brooklyn several nights a week.

His training seems to be going well.

Several weeks ago, Roth saved the life of a heart attack victim in the Bronx by using a defibrillator.

He takes his work so seriously that he did not want publicity so that it would not "diminish what I am trying to do here." He has said that he did not want the neighborhoods he was working in named so that he would not draw attention to himself or co-workers.

"You would never know you were dealing with a rock-'n'-roll guy," said Linda Reissman, Roth's EMS consultant and tutor. "His commitment really is touching. He wants to help people."

http://www.cnn.com/2004/SHOWBIZ/Music/11/16/people.roth.ap/

Edited November 22, 2004 by BERIGAN

[catesta]

Daaaaaammmmmnnnnn.....

Will his EMT uniform include skin tight zebra print spandex pants?

Edited November 22, 2004 by catesta

[Dmitry]

I met David Lee Roth in Manhattan last year. He was with one of the most beautiful cocaine chicks I've ever seen.

His pants were tighter than hers.

Both were seriously stoned.

[catesta]

I hope that was pre-EMT trainee David Lee Roth, or at least off hours David Lee Roth.

[catesta]

Since we are on the subject of Daved Lee Roth.

Has anyone heard the DLR prank call tape some guy made?

I think I heard it on Stern. The dude called some blues club in Kansas City claiming to be Roth and was trying to get booked at the club.

Funny stuff.

[DTMX]

Several weeks ago, Roth saved the life of a heart attack victim in the Bronx by using a defibrillator.

I'd hate the last thing I heard before I died to be David Lee Roth yelling "Everybody clear! Boobadee bop!"

Edited November 22, 2004 by DTMX

[JSngry]

I met David Lee Roth in Manhattan last year. He was with one of the most beautiful cocaine chicks I've ever seen.

His pants were tighter than hers.

Both were seriously stoned.

I hope that was pre-EMT trainee David Lee Roth, or at least off hours David Lee Roth.

On the other hand, if you need to induce a rapid heartbeat with no time to waste...

Edited November 23, 2004 by JSngry

[Big Wheel]

Resurrecting this one because I heard a guy yelling for about 10 minutes on the bus today to a female companion (who also looked like she'd seen better days) and some of it was pure gold. (Why do all my best stories about drunks involve public transit?)

Most of the rant was about how he can tell a lot about a person's character from their shoes. So a couple of the choicest quotes were:

"Jesus didn't even wear SHOES. He wore sandals. But he was JESUS."

"I can tell so much about a person from what kind of shoes they have. For instance, if you wear jogging shoes...that tells me you're a jogger."

At one point he also started singing the theme from "Secret Agent Man" at full volume in response to a fellow passenger who he apparently thought looked like a secret agent.

Edited May 28, 2010 by Big Wheel

[kinuta]

One incident I'll never forget. Several people were standing on the stairway at the back of a double decker bus, waiting to get off at the next stop. I think the drunk said ' Let me off!' before he vomited all over the guy two steps lower on the stairs. A serious punch up followed.