Ass down the throat is infinitely preferable to throat up the ass. Tongue up the ass, though, is a wonderful thing, and if you find a woman who's into doing that, treat her very special. Of course, if that's not the side of the street you walk down, proceed accordingly, and bon chance!
Otherwise, I feel your pain and can only hope that you stay on to contribute.
No, I think this is The Post of the Year!