ghost of miles Posted June 24, 2005 Report Posted June 24, 2005 Just remembered this one while I was talking with a younger worker (yikes, am I gettin' older or what? ) Quite popular when I was in the fifth grade... MR. JAWS Dickie Goodman We are here on the beach where a giant shark has just eaten a girl swimmer Well Mr. Jaws, how was it? "Dynomite" And what did she say when you grabbed her? "Please Mr. Please" I know sharks are stupid, but what did you think when you took that first bite? "How sweet it is" Mr. Jaws, before you swim out to sea, have you anything else to say? "Why can't we be friends, why can't we be friends?" With me now is the local sheriff. Sheriff Brody, the shark will be back for lunch. What do you intend to do? "Do a little dance, make a little love, get down tonight" Just arriving is oceanographer Matt Hooper. Sir, if someone is attacked by a shark, what should they do? "Do the hustle" We are going aboard the fishing boat of Captain Quint. Captain, will you be able to catch this giant shark? "I will", "I will", "I will" (thank you, captain) "I will" (captain!) "I will" (captain!) "I will" (captain!) When you catch one of these sharks, what do you feel like? "Like a Rhinestone Cowboy" We've just sighted the shark again. He's coming straight for us. Captain Quint is shouting something at him. "Get you baby one of these nights" Hey Jaws, the captain says he's going to catch you. What do you think of that? "Jive talkin'" Uh-oh, here he comes again! (Gun shots) They've hit him! Mr. Jaws, why doesn't anything seem to hurt you? "Big boys don't cry, big boys don't cry" He's coming right onto the boat! Mr. Jaws, why are you grabbing my hand? "Wouldn't you give your hand to a friend?" No wait! Mr. Jaws! That's not the way this record is supposed to end! Help! Help! (Drowning noises) Quote
Dan Gould Posted June 24, 2005 Report Posted June 24, 2005 Its quite scary that those lyrics are starting to ring bells in my own old head. But its got nothin' on Ray Steven's "The Streak". Quote
JSngry Posted June 24, 2005 Report Posted June 24, 2005 Dickie Goodman had "many" records of this ilk. It was sorta his thing, actually. Quote
ghost of miles Posted June 24, 2005 Author Report Posted June 24, 2005 Dickie Goodman had "many" records of this ilk. It was sorta his thing, actually. ← The Weird Al Yankovic of his time? I thought that he did more than one, but I couldn't remember the followups--or predecessors. Quote
JSngry Posted June 24, 2005 Report Posted June 24, 2005 Goodman' specialty (hell, it might've been the only thing he did!) was the "interview" record, where tfe answers were song excerpts. I remember them popping up in (very) light rotation on Top-40 radios every few years, usually whenever there was a big national fad or something. But the only one I have a distinct memory of is the one about the UFO. See if he's on AMG. Everybody else is! Quote
ghost of miles Posted June 24, 2005 Author Report Posted June 24, 2005 There's an archived Goldmine piece on Goodman online that argues, "Scan the Top 40 listings, listen to the hit radio station. There's that Notorious B.I.G. tribute song with the Police's "Every Breath You Take" as the instrumental track. It's followed by White Town's tune with a sample from an old 78. Spin the dial over to the easy listening station, and there's Bruce Springsteen's "Secret Garden" with snippets of dialogue from the "Jerry Maguire" motion picture. Meanwhile, a melange of 11 sports anthems called the "Jock Jams" gets steady airplay, and that's followed by the Jackson Five making an ersatz cameo appearance on Freak Nasty's hit "Da Dip." Dickie Goodman took that first step towards sampling, remixing, and symbolic juxtaposition. He was the first performer to use fragments of other people's hits to build his own chartbusters. Whether it was a Martian with Little Richard's voice, a President copping lyrics from an Alice Cooper track, or a shark with a taste for the Bee Gees, Goodman's "snippet" records became popular Top 40 radio movies." Dickie Goodman as the original mixer? Quote
Kalo Posted June 24, 2005 Report Posted June 24, 2005 (edited) I remember these records well. I recall that a friend and I spent many hours with a little cassette recorder making our own versions of these things, usually Watergate-themed. Albert Brooks did a hilarious parody of these on his LP A Star is Bought. The over-arching comic idea of the LP was that he was going to maximize his chances of having a hit by recording one track for every existing radio format. So there's a country song, a call-in show, a classical piece (Brooks singing the long lost lyrics to Bolero!), and even something for nostalgia formats: one of Brooks's "pre-natal" radio shows. Hilarious meta-media parody, way ahead of its time (mid-1970s). The Dickie Goodman parody was his Top 40 entry. The hitch was that his budget was too small to afford rights to the real Top 40 hits, so he just wrote his own snippets. The result is funnier than it has any right to be. Sadly OOP. Edited June 24, 2005 by Kalo Quote
Jazzmoose Posted June 25, 2005 Report Posted June 25, 2005 Dickie Goodman as the original mixer? ← Oooh...that's really stretching it... I remember these things quite well. I even remember thinking they were clever until I was 14 or so.... Quote
nemo7 Posted June 25, 2005 Report Posted June 25, 2005 spike jones and his (many) orchestra(s) bizarre funfare there Quote
Free For All Posted June 25, 2005 Report Posted June 25, 2005 Remember the song "Funny Farm" (or something to that effect) from the 60s I think? You know..... "they're coming to take me away, ha ha hee hee ho ho...." That song kind of creeped me out when I first heard it. Quote
Michael Fitzgerald Posted June 25, 2005 Report Posted June 25, 2005 Napoleon XIV. The flip side had the same tune recorded backwards. Mike Quote
Free For All Posted June 25, 2005 Report Posted June 25, 2005 Mike, you are awesome! BTW, I've been enjoying the Gryce book lately. Quote
Dan Gould Posted June 25, 2005 Report Posted June 25, 2005 I remember listening to an oldies radio show countdown of novelty tunes. The one FFA refers to was in the top 5 with the usual suspects (Monster Mash, Purple People Eater) and one I missed when I was growing up: Chuck Berry, "My Ding a Ling" When I was a little bitty boy my grandmother bought me a cute little toy Silver bells hangin' on a string she told me it was my ding a ling My ding a ling, my ding a ling I want to play with my ding a ling My ding a ling, my ding a ling I want to play with my ding a ling And then mother took me to Grammer School But I stopped all in the vestibule Every time that bell would ring catch me playin' with my ding a ling Once I was climbing the garden wall I slipped and had a terrible fall I fell so hard I heard bells ring but held on to my ding a ling Once I was swimming cross Turtle creek many snappers all around my feet sure was hard swimming cross that thing with both hands holdin' my ding a ling This here song it ain't so sad the cutest little song you ever had those of you who will not sing You must be playin' with your own ding a ling My ding a ling Your ding a ling, your ding a ling We saw you playin' with your ding a ling My ding a ling everybody sing I want to play with my ding a ling Quote
JSngry Posted June 25, 2005 Report Posted June 25, 2005 The flip side had the same tune recorded backwards. Yeah, and it was called ....."Ah Ah Yawa Em Ekat Ot Gnimoc Eryeht" Square business. Quote
Guest Posted July 2, 2005 Report Posted July 2, 2005 Marilyn Monroe singing Happy Birthday to JFK. "Our Song" by Roger Waters and Ron Geesin. "Brilliant Corners" by T.Monk Any marches played by a brass band in the vicinity of a lot of Germans. Playing "I Did It My Way" at a retirement home...and watching their expressions when the singer sings the first line... The five Supreme Court Justices who recently OK'd the latest eminent domain ruling humming, into megaphones, Zappa's "The Little House I Used To Live In" while the other 4 Justices scream at the top of their lungs the Zappa song, "What's The Ugliest Part of Your Body?" Xenophobes, rascists, and other such brainiacs singing "God Bless America". "I'm A Lumber Jack" by Monty Python. Osama Bin Laden singing a medley of "Misty", "Do Nothing Till You Hear From Me", and "Bye-Bye Blackbird". Everytime Richard Nixon played the piano. Paris Hilton singing the Beatles tune "Hey You've Got To Hide Your Love Away". Put all our Congress-critters on the steps of the Supreme Court singing Hendrix' "Freedom". A crack head singing the Beatles tune "I'm So Tired" accompanied by a speed freak whistling "So Tired" by Bobby Timmons. Quote
chris olivarez Posted July 2, 2005 Report Posted July 2, 2005 I hope that the Albert Brooks record comes back in print one day. I'd love to get it especially for his "duet" with Albert King. Quote
Chuck Nessa Posted July 2, 2005 Report Posted July 2, 2005 Napoleon XIV. The flip side had the same tune recorded backwards. Mike ← VIX Noelopan. Quote
JSngry Posted July 2, 2005 Report Posted July 2, 2005 Marilyn Monroe singing Happy Birthday to JFK. "Our Song" by Roger Waters and Ron Geesin. "Brilliant Corners" by T.Monk Any marches played by a brass band in the vicinity of a lot of Germans. Playing "I Did It My Way" at a retirement home...and watching their expressions when the singer sings the first line... The five Supreme Court Justices who recently OK'd the latest eminent domain ruling humming, into megaphones, Zappa's "The Little House I Used To Live In" while the other 4 Justices scream at the top of their lungs the Zappa song, "What's The Ugliest Part of Your Body?" Xenophobes, rascists, and other such brainiacs singing "God Bless America". "I'm A Lumber Jack" by Monty Python. Osama Bin Laden singing a medley of "Misty", "Do Nothing Till You Hear From Me", and "Bye-Bye Blackbird". Everytime Richard Nixon played the piano. Paris Hilton singing the Beatles tune "Hey You've Got To Hide Your Love Away". Put all our Congress-critters on the steps of the Supreme Court singing Hendrix' "Freedom". A crack head singing the Beatles tune "I'm So Tired" accompanied by a speed freak whistling "So Tired" by Bobby Timmons. ← Quote
Kalo Posted July 2, 2005 Report Posted July 2, 2005 (edited) I hope that the Albert Brooks record comes back in print one day. I'd love to get it especially for his "duet" with Albert King. ← Rhino reissued his first album Comedy Minus One a few years back. But I guess it didn't sell well enough for them to want to reissue A Star is Bought. That Albert King track is the shit. It's called "The Englishman-German-Jew Blues" and it features King singing and playing guitar in a call-and-response duet with Brooks. King sings about how depressed he is and in between Brooks tells a joke to try to cheer him up! In the context of the album it's Brooks's attempt to cut a track for the free-form FM radio market. By the way, the album was co-written and co-produced by none other than Harry Shearer, and features cameos by Daws Butler, Pat Carroll, Mickey Dolenz, David Geffen(!), Emmylou Harris, Sheldon Leonard, Harry Nilsson, Rob Reiner, Linda Ronstadt, and Peter Tork, among many others. The musicians involved include not only Albert King, but Oscar Brashear, Conte Candoli, Buddy Collette, Russ Freeman, and Andrew Gold. It's an amazing record for 1975, WAY ahead of the curve, anticipating what SCTV and others would do in the years to come. It might even be the first "Mockumentary" (or does the fake newreel in Citizen Kane count?). In any case, an unjustly unrecognized classic in my opinion. Edited July 2, 2005 by Kalo Quote
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