Squirrel mini-emergency

[couw]

why so testy, Couw? It's been a rather fun thread afterall...

I've been sniffing amonia all day

[rachel]

why so testy, Couw? It's been a rather fun thread afterall...

I've been sniffing amonia all day

[catesta]

why so testy, Couw? It's been a rather fun thread afterall...

I've been sniffing amonia all day

Now get away from my window!

[The Magnificent Goldberg]

I knew this would be a good read! Thanks folks. Will forward to some of my more peculiar friends.

MG

[The Magnificent Goldberg]

What's German for "bump!"?

http://uk.news.yahoo.com/rtrs/20070614/tod...el-1a5e080.html

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Squirrel goes on rampage in Germany

Reuters - Thursday, June 14 01:12 pmBERLIN (Reuters) - An aggressive squirrel attacked and injured three people in a German town before a 72-year-old pensioner dispatched the rampaging animal with his crutch.

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The squirrel first ran into a house in the southern town of Passau, leapt from behind on a 70-year-old woman, and sank its teeth into her hand, a local police spokesman said on Thursday.

With the squirrel still hanging from her hand, the woman ran onto the street in panic, where she managed to shake it off.

The animal then entered a building site and jumped on a construction worker, injuring him on the hand and arm, before he managed to fight it off with a measuring pole.

"After that, the squirrel went into the 72-year-old man's garden and massively attacked him on the arms, hand and thigh," the spokesman said. "Then he killed it with his crutch."

The spokesman said experts thought the attack may have been linked to the mating season or because the squirrel was ill.

MG

[MoGrubb]

That was one pissed off squirrel.

[J Larsen]

Maybe some day I'll tell you how this story *really* ended.

[Shawn]

[slide_advantage_redoux]

I am really surprised that this little gem has never been posted.

I don't have the directions on how to construct the contraption, but from all indications it works like a charm!

Maybe one of these will dissuade the little bastard.

[7/4]

I wonder how long it takes them to learn...

[Jazzmoose]

[J Larsen]

Fine. If you guys are just going to fool around, I'll keep the tragically comic ending to this story to myself.

[Big Wheel]

Let me guess, you tried my squirrelpaper theory and on the surface, it doesn't seem to be working.

Listen, I know it's not easy to stay the course, but when the going gets tough, the solution is actually more and more nuts. You have to have a surge of nuts in the danger areas outside or you'll never get the squirrels under control.

[J Larsen]

Actually, the amonia stopped working and the fucker came back and almost gnawed hisway through my window frame. So I worked out another way to keep him off my window sill, which I won't divulge for fear of being accused of animal cruelty; I'll simply refer to it as The Plan of Last Resort (TPLR). One thing I may not have mentioned earlier is that even prior to implenting TPLR, he had also been trying to gnaw his way into my upstairs neighbor's apartment. The upstairs neighbor was not an individual, but rather the world headquarters of a rainforest defense organization, so they were not particularly receptive to my plan to repel the wildlife, and scoffed at TPLR. Once I implented TPLR, the fucker was having NO PART of my windowsill anymore, and focused all of his energy on the upstairs neighbor's window - I knew this from A) the absence of the fucker on my windowsill and B) the wood raining down on my windowsill from upstairs. Within a few days of implementing TPLR, I heard screaming from above, which quickly became screaming traveling down the staircase! The squirrel made its way into the upstairs apartment, freaked out the nonprofit workers who bolted down the stairs, and the squirrel followed them down the stairs and out into the street! After he finally made it outside, he never returned. But the nonprofit upstairs is still stuck with a hole chewed straight through the window (the landlord never fixes anything regardless of severity or urgency).

I have since moved to a place two blocks away with storm windows and 24 hour maintenance.

[Aggie87]

Well, from the squirrel's POV, Mission Accomplished. No need to go back to THAT particular building. How far is two blocks in squirrel paces?

[couw]

http://www.collegehumor.com/moogaloop/moog...clip_id=1764124

click to watch. tan-tan-taaaaa!

[Chas]

So I worked out another way to keep him off my window sill, which I won't divulge for fear of being accused of animal cruelty; I'll simply refer to it as The Plan of Last Resort (TPLR)....After he finally made it outside, he never returned.

Gee what a missed opportunity for FUN ! and profit . Not to mention the fact that no future squirrel would dare bother a man whose squirrel lamp was in plain view . Truly a more enlightened approach .

[sheldonm]

Jan, you're telling a squirrel chewed through glass? What do you take us for ???

m~

[7/4]

That was one of those tough NYC squirrels. Gotta watch out for them...

[Noj]

Squirrels are the most common roadkill out here. Poor bastards run the wrong way half the time.

[7/4]

These are tougher or smarter or somethin'. The only roadkill you might see on a Manhattan street is a mouse or a rat.

[J Larsen]

Jan, you're telling a squirrel chewed through glass? What do you take us for ???

m~

It chewed through the wood window frame upstairs (and most of the way through mine).

[sheldonm]

Jan, you're telling a squirrel chewed through glass? What do you take us for ???

m~

It chewed through the wood window frame upstairs (and most of the way through mine).

But the nonprofit upstairs is still stuck with a hole chewed straight through the window (the landlord never fixes anything regardless of severity or urgency).

Now that makes more sense....I've seen some crazy squirrels including one that ate himself to death and died next to a consumed 40 lb. bag of sunflower seeds in my garage dead with all fours in the air!....but not one that could eat through glass!

m~

[J Larsen]

Jan, you're telling a squirrel chewed through glass? What do you take us for ???

m~

It chewed through the wood window frame upstairs (and most of the way through mine).

But the nonprofit upstairs is still stuck with a hole chewed straight through the window (the landlord never fixes anything regardless of severity or urgency).

Now that makes more sense....I've seen some crazy squirrels including one that ate himself to death and died next to a consumed 40 lb. bag of sunflower seeds in my garage dead with all fours in the air!....but not one that could eat through glass!

m~

At 1:17AM I tend to fogive myself for saying "the window" when I mean more specifically "the window frame".

[sheldonm]

Jan, you're telling a squirrel chewed through glass? What do you take us for ???

m~

It chewed through the wood window frame upstairs (and most of the way through mine).

But the nonprofit upstairs is still stuck with a hole chewed straight through the window (the landlord never fixes anything regardless of severity or urgency).

Now that makes more sense....I've seen some crazy squirrels including one that ate himself to death and died next to a consumed 40 lb. bag of sunflower seeds in my garage dead with all fours in the air!....but not one that could eat through glass!

m~

At 1:17AM I tend to fogive myself for saying "the window" when I mean more specifically "the window frame".

I forgive you as well. BTW, your photo from Vision Fest is going out tomorrow....thank god the squirrel is gone!

m~