DukeCity Posted December 29, 2007 Report Share Posted December 29, 2007 (edited) Hang in there, Mark. Let's hope 2008 will bring good things to you. A move to Oregon sounds like it could be good. I grew up there, and visit once or twice a year. Portland would be a great place to live! Edit to add: Hope you're able to get internet access whatever your new living situation is. We want you to continue to hang here! Edited December 29, 2007 by DukeCity Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BruceH Posted December 29, 2007 Report Share Posted December 29, 2007 Sorry to hear the bad news. Hopefully a move will do you a world of good. I've visited Oregon a few times and was very taken with it. It might be just what the doctor ordered. Very, very best of luck to you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jazzmoose Posted December 29, 2007 Author Report Share Posted December 29, 2007 I suck at these things; I have a hard time saying anything that isn't super-cliched... Jan, I know exactly what you mean! I never know what to say on threads like these except the obvious. But you know, now that I'm the one going through it, I realize that the obvious is just what I need to hear! Thanks to you and everyone else here for the support and kind words. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jazzmoose Posted December 29, 2007 Author Report Share Posted December 29, 2007 Mark, I'd add one thing. If you haven't done it already, get yourself another kitty. Pets can be a lot of help with a move and getting over shit. I haven't yet, but I think you're right. I'll probably wait until I get there (wherever that is; looking more like Oregon the more I think about it), but yeah, I think another cat is something I need. Certainly higher on my list right now than another human relationship! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
marcello Posted December 29, 2007 Report Share Posted December 29, 2007 Mark, I'd add one thing. If you haven't done it already, get yourself another kitty. Pets can be a lot of help with a move and getting over shit. I haven't yet, but I think you're right. I'll probably wait until I get there (wherever that is; looking more like Oregon the more I think about it), but yeah, I think another cat is something I need. Certainly higher on my list right now than another human relationship! Ther's a old saying "There's lots of fish in the sea". Keep your chin up! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tonym Posted December 29, 2007 Report Share Posted December 29, 2007 Time for a fresh start then Mark! You're a young(ish), happening guy! Oregon sounds idyllic and you're not alone in these situations. When I say all the very best of luck, I mean sincerely, as others do here, all the very best of luck. not just this new year, but every new year. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sal Posted December 29, 2007 Report Share Posted December 29, 2007 Sorry to hear this jazzmoose. You seem like a good guy, and it sucks when bad things happen to good people. If I could re-locate anywhere right now, it would be Oregon...its a great place, and seems like it would be a perfect place to start anew. Best of luck. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JSngry Posted December 29, 2007 Report Share Posted December 29, 2007 Damn, I read the board top-down, so I missed this until now, so sorry about that... Man, it happens. It happens a lot. All I can hope is that y'all's relationship had enough good times that it's not left either one of you permanently soured on the idea of love per se. That would be a triumph of "evil", that would... It's easy to say, and I don't know how much cred I have in saying it, but stay as strong as possible, stay as positive as possible, and do what you gotta do to believe that this is the end of one chapter, not the end of the whole book. You may not "know" us, but you do, and we you. Lotta love built up here over the years, and it's here when you need it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joe G Posted December 29, 2007 Report Share Posted December 29, 2007 May your heath and well-being be on the upswing from here on out, Mark. And I think that great sense of humor of yours is going to be one of your best assets in getting to the next level. Best of luck in finding a new home, as well. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Quincy Posted December 30, 2007 Report Share Posted December 30, 2007 Oregon needs a moose, especially that extra special subspecies known as the Jazzmoose. You'll fare better in the fall thru spring rain rather than La. humidity I think. I think we're first in the country in per capita cat ownership and micro-breweries. Not sure if those 2 are related. And I'm pretty sure we're 49th in the union in church attendance (only Alaska has us beat, or um, lags us.) I think one of the first 2 fun facts might be behind that stat. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
medjuck Posted December 30, 2007 Report Share Posted December 30, 2007 Can't add much except to wish you good luck and to agree that a move to Oregon sounds like a good move. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
connoisseur series500 Posted December 30, 2007 Report Share Posted December 30, 2007 Damn! Just came upon this now. Keep your chin up, bro! No wisdom to impart. It is what it is; life aint' done. Time ticks and the sun moves in the sky. We gotta move too. Changes abound for all of us. I'm of your generation and have been forced to go back to school for the next two years on borrowed money. It is what it is. Just accept it and make it happen. Sentiment might be there, but it can't hold us back. It is what it is. Let's make it work like we've always done. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dave James Posted December 30, 2007 Report Share Posted December 30, 2007 Moose, Even if you're the one who was making the call, this is still one of the toughest things anyone has to go through. The fact that it appears this was her decision and not yours makes it that much more difficult. Taking the long view at this point is difficult. There's all the recriminations and second guessing that need to be worked through before you can even begin to put this behind you. Nonetheless, you've at least moved forward to the point that you know you want out of Louisiana. Certainly, a change in scenery is a big first step. The most difficult thing to when you're still reeling is to think that things can get better. But, you know what? They can and they usually do. For sure, it may take awhile, but you have to believe they will. Oregon? I've been a lifelong native. Any idea where you might wind up touching down? Up over and out. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
B. Goren. Posted December 30, 2007 Report Share Posted December 30, 2007 Mark, I have nothing to add to what have been already said. All I can do is wishing you all the best and happier 2008. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jazzmoose Posted December 30, 2007 Author Report Share Posted December 30, 2007 Oregon? I've been a lifelong native. Any idea where you might wind up touching down? La Grande is where I have family, but I would imagine that is just for starters. Seems a bit small to me. But who knows; I might like it. We'll see. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jazzmoose Posted December 30, 2007 Author Report Share Posted December 30, 2007 Don't want to get all sappy, but damn it, you guys are the best! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DTMX Posted December 30, 2007 Report Share Posted December 30, 2007 Sorry to hear about it, but things will work out. I think Alan Thicke said it best when he wrote: Now, the world don't move to the beat of just one drum, What might be right for you, may not be right for some. Not trying to make light, but it was the first thing that popped into my head. With your sense of humor, you'll be fine. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BERIGAN Posted December 30, 2007 Report Share Posted December 30, 2007 Don't want to get all sappy, but damn it, you guys are the best! Yes, we really are..... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tim McG Posted December 30, 2007 Report Share Posted December 30, 2007 (edited) Mark, I, too, am very sorry to learn of this situation....but I think you will find much comfort and support in the knowledge that many of us here have been through a divorce, too. It's never easy and always challenge to transition back to the single life. I went through it many years ago and my best friend, at age 53, is struggling with the whole dating thing right now after his split. Just know that there is a sympathtic "ear" on this very BBS. We are listening and my PMs are always open to you as well. Go easy, my friend. Tim Edited December 30, 2007 by GoodSpeak Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Free For All Posted December 30, 2007 Report Share Posted December 30, 2007 I've been following this thread and haven't really known what to say that hasn't been said already. Many nice posts already....... Really sorry to hear about this, Mark. I think the resolution of a bad situation is always a step forward, but that doesn't make the process any more bearable. I feel like the pain I've experienced from my own divorce has become "manageable", but may never completely go away (of course I'm only about a year and a half into it). In addition, you just had to deal with Moose's passing recently, so you've had a full plate! Loss of friends, family and pets is a tough one to deal with. I hope you have someone (friends, family, therapist) to reach out to- I know that helped me to figure things out a bit (and generally just vent). I also understand the frustration of following a spouse to a job and suddenly being cut loose. I've lately become aware of SO many marriages that were ended by the wife. I'm still at the point where I have no interest in starting a new relationship, mostly from a general lack of trust and also fear of getting hurt again. I hope this changes someday, but I'm not trying to fight it right now and just allowing it to resolve naturally. I hope you use this opportunity to think about what YOU want and go after it. It sounds like the move to Oregon might be a good plan. And by all means keep your sense of humor, it's one of your many strong points and will save your ass! You obviously have a lot of friends here. The support of the board members when I shared my situation was very helpful, not something you'd expect from the "impersonal" internet......but then this place is special. I think once you get to wherever you're going and start to reclaim your life you'll feel better. In the meantime take care of yourself! And please let us know what's going on! Much love for you here my man! Paul Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rachel Posted December 30, 2007 Report Share Posted December 30, 2007 Yes, please don't stay away too long and keep us updated as you feel the need to vent. When the board was 'closing down', one of my first thoughts was ' I may never read a post from Jazzmoose or Catesta again--that just can't be!' I missed you when you took a breather when Moose passed and was so happy that you came back. I'm sorry that you're going through this horrible situation and wish for you a light at the end of the tunnel very soon. When you're going through one of your roughest days, just remember that we all here you and will be waiting for your return as well as Avatar Moose... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gslade Posted December 31, 2007 Report Share Posted December 31, 2007 Mark LaGrande is beautiful country (alway been partial to the Grande Ronde Valley). Change is always difficult but don't let it get the best of you. I always try to think of it as opportunity. I also know how hard it can be to convince yourself. I will be looking at several large changes myself this coming year and can't seem to shake the sense of impending loss, but I know it must be done and thus a good thing. Best wishes and looking forward to hearing from you. Sincerely Gene Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tim McG Posted December 31, 2007 Report Share Posted December 31, 2007 (edited) Beautiful, indeed: Edited December 31, 2007 by GoodSpeak Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
papsrus Posted December 31, 2007 Report Share Posted December 31, 2007 They say (don't they?) that the three most stressful things in life are ending a relationship, moving and losing a loved one. You're dealing with all three. You will feel disoriented (I'm sure you already do). That's of course normal, considering. It will take time. Stay patient with yourself and allow time to heal and re-balance. There will be some "letting go" you'll have to deal with. And that's a process that can be difficult. You may not be able to embrace anything new completely until some time passes. So you should be careful about moving. It may be somewhat disorienting, obviously. It won't cure the emptiness, and you may even feel like you've made a mistake at times. But as a little time goes by and you get your balance again, things will start to become easier, more natural. Laughter returns. Excitement for all the things you enjoy returns. You emerge, scarred but wiser and more complete, Just some thoughts from someone who's been there. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jazzmoose Posted December 31, 2007 Author Report Share Posted December 31, 2007 Well put. Frankly, I'm pretty sure I'm in shock over the whole situation right now. Hopefully I won't make too many stupid decisions. Just have to keep on trying... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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