papsrus

Chew on this ... According to askoxford.com: Yet Wiki says: I vaguely remember the Earl from grade school, but the sage Hillel predates the Earl by a few eons. So was the Earl of Sandwich really a loaf with a half-baked claim to fame? Should we really be calling these things hillels?

check in the sammich. . If I had some more bread, I'd get another one. As it is, I think the shirt's toast.

I lost my shirt

Late 70s -- Ella, Basie, Oscar, lots of Oscar. Big bands and bluesy outfits, a smattering of Tom Waits, me living in various rural settings and occasionally getting into "the zone" on the spoons while reprising Santana's Woodstock performance. 80s-90s and first half of 00s -- Nothing, and me living in various urban settings. Using cutlery now. 2005 -- "One Down, One Up, Live at the Half Note," John Coltrane, is released. Mind gets blown. Bank account soon follows. 2007 (or thereabouts) -- Stumble through the doors at organissimo and plant myself at the bar for a look-see. Beats the last joint I was kicked out of. Today -- :eye:

Yeah, I basically stopped drinking years ago -- all but the occasional glass of red wine, maybe a martini once a year or something. Drugs, too -- many, many years ago. Cigs is without a doubt the toughest to quit, maybe because it was the only true addiction. The other stuff ... nah.

Sugar ... forget it. One thing at a time for me. I have half a fresh peach pie in the fridge. Whipped cream on top. It is unbelievably tasty! Which reminds me ... my dad, a retired physician (who you would think might have some regard for diet) looked me straight in the eye as he was chewing on a piece of fudge the other day and said, with a straight face: "It would really take a lot of chocolate to make me sick." I laughed out loud. Like a kid, he is. (I was chewing on some fudge, too). Ah ... good times, good times.

Thank you for a woman's point of view. I guess one of the things is, it's sometimes not easy to figure out what we ourselves want, and when you're in that frame of mind, figuring out what your spouse wants is all but impossible. Coming to some sort of agreement on what is best for the both of you ... well, I don't think it's possible if we don't know what we ourselves want in the first place. That's why I thought it might be helpful for Alexander to figure out what HE wants first. Does he really want to do the work to save his marriage? After he's figured that out, then he can focus on what she wants; what's good for both of them as a unit, etc. I will say this: I've become much more attuned to these sorts of things now that I'm divorced. (I might seem like a lug nut, but I was worse before). ... Not sure what that says about me or my now-defunct marriage, but there it is. I do hope Alexander is doing OK.

Well done! The first few days are the most difficult. I could not have done it alone, so if you need any suggestions, check in here and I'll pass along what I've learned from the program I used. Few important things to reiterate: 1. Drink tons of water during the first week to flush the nicotine out of your system. 2. Change up your routines so that you don't fall into traps where you really crave one. If you had coffee first thing in the morning, for example, take a shower first thing in the morning instead. Mix it up. 3. The cravings will come, but they will pass in 3-5 minutes whether you act on them or not. 4. Having a cigarette will NOT satisfy your craving, it will only feed it. ... you'll just want another, and another. 5. Find some small exercise (walking, even) that will allow you to enjoy breathing fresh air again! I've really found that I'm enjoying just breathing more clearly. And there is an initial benefit once you quit, as far as improved breathing goes. Let me know if you feel that, because I sure did, and the clinic confirmed that this was an immediate benefit. Those are the big ones that really help me. Don't give in to the cravings and enjoy breathing again. congrats! made two (maybe half-hearted) attempts in response to this thread but with no success so far... what i did give up after this thread was my other habit of eating 500 grams of chocolate a day which i'd been carrying with me for a year - giving that one up was so easy it was ridiculous... thought it would be good to know i quit anything at least (and 500 grams of chocolate aren't that cheap or healthy either i guess) It's great that you're trying with the smoking. The shame (if that's the right word) is not in falling off the horse. The shame is in not trying to get back on it again. I'd encourage you to ask for help from your doctor, or any doctor. Breathing is a wonderful thing!!

If I understand the argument, you're saying that a physical object (a CD) has to be involved for an improper transfer (theft) of the music to occur? And if I do understand this correctly, how does the argument address the inevitability (we're told) of the demise of the CD, when there is no physical object anymore? (Or, in the case of music that is today sold only in digital format? ... The Dave Douglas Live at the Jazz Standard comes to mind.) It's a complicated problem, so I'm not getting evangelical on the issue or anything. Just probing.

Can't help but notice all the images are of women. What does that say? Probably that men wouldn't likely consult a magazine like this.

I think it's more a matter of wanting to take care of than it is wanting to be taken care of. Seriously. Oh yes, there's a lot of that, too, of course. Women need to nurture. But I'm with a woman now who in a previous relationship did all the giving without getting anything back. ... That's an empty deal. Communication and intimacy break down. Frustrations are impossible to resolve. And the relationship becomes like a black hole collapsing on itself. You reach critical mass and you can't turn back. You either escape or get crushed. I think you nailed it here: The giving is its own reward, isn't it? ... What's your hourly fee again? .....

Yep. Just "listening," really listening -- that's the key, I think. Women want to express what they're feeling. Men want to find "solutions." Many times, women don't want to hear about any solutions, especially YOUR solutions. They just want to vent and express themselves and know that they're being heard. Sometimes it's better to not offer any solutions, but just listen, really listen. And when she says something is important to her, you'd darn well better be listening. In many (many) ways, women want to be taken care of. That's just the nature of things. You stop doing that, they lose interest. That's what I've learned (too late for my marriage, but not too late for my current situation.)

Who was it that said: "Find something you enjoy doing and you'll never work a day in your life." A bit of an overstatement, but ... the right idea.

From the second writeup: OK. What are the chances we can scrape together $3 mil? There are 2302 registered members. That breaks out to around $1,300 each. Not an unrealistic sum. Say only half the members wanted in. That's $2,600 each. High, but ... still chump change compared to the possible return on investment here. We'd have to rent a warehouse and pay for shipping, etc., but the sale of non-jazz music alone would fund organissimo for a while and give every member who chipped in a very nice return on investment. Plus, we could arm wrestle for the jazz titles. ... I'm just sayin' ... (rubbing hands with glee).

Today at Barnes & Noble: Miles Davis -- "The Complete Birth of the Cool" (Blue Note) and Count Basie -- "April in Paris" (Verve)

Does this mean the Rays are going to win the World Series!? ... Damnit! I just jinxed them now ... (Any no-hitters we need to get rid of while we're at it?)

I've never been to counseling, but this isn't the first time I've heard that counselors will side with the woman right off the bat. Even if more fault lies with the man, it seems like a bad tactic on the part of the counselor, as far as getting the therapy going.

How nice of this fellow to be passing around other people's correspondence, too. And the lovely little snip about medication. ... It all fits, I guess.

Yes. Buying a house is important. Selling ... ah, that's another story. But I think you have to find out what is important to YOU now, and follow that path. If trying to restore your marriage is the most important thing, you have to put all your effort into that. I believe a man can win back the heart of his wife -- after all, she fell in love with him once. It can be done. Women love to be courted and romanced (well, most women do, anyways). ... Not to sound sexist or anything, but you can change a woman's mind if you really WANT to. But you have to ask yourself honestly if that's what you really want. If yes, I'd say move mountains to do it. But if you're not willing to move those mountains, then you have to stop blaming yourself, admit that it is what it is, and move on to the next chapter in your life. You only live once. So figure out what YOU WANT. Then figure out how to make it happen. ... Easier said than done, but worth a try.

My wife won't even let me talk about the Cubs, since she thinks I'll jinx them. They do look good though. Damnit man! You just jinxed them!!! (or is that only if your wife hears you talking about them?)

First off, I'm sorry. I just went through a divorce but no children involved. (I'm much, much happier now. There is an upside). Secondly, it is not your fault. People grow apart. There's a million reasons why. Only you know your reasons. I have read a bit about children in divorces (for another reason) and one of the main things is that children often feel responsible in some way for the divorce. You have to make sure that they realize they aren't responsible. That you and your wife will always be their father and mother, etc. ... There's a book on amazon, FWIW, titled "Helping Your Kids Cope With Divorce the Sandcastle Way" that is supposed to be a good resource for dealing with children in divorce. I haven't read it but everyone else in the country seems to have. Might want to check it out. Lastly, don't go to match.com right away, it'll only make you extremely depressed. You'll work your way through it and come out the other side OK. Better off, in many ways. Good that you're talking it out here, anyways.

This has got to be a record (and a good one ...) ... An OOP box set by the third post. I for one would encourage you to post more often! No telling what might happen. Awesome offer by Chuck Nessa. And it's good to see good things happen with good karma. I'd throw a note in there when you return the fake set telling the guy in Oakland that he's engaging in theft. But, he already knows that. ... Screw him. Alert the feds!

Too bad you missed the box set Yah. I'm kind of bummed, but ... that's the way the old box set bounces sometimes.

Man. ... that's an easy team to get a hate on for. Mind you, the Rays should have won it in 9 innings. But backup catcher Shawn Riggans dropped the throw home that would have nailed the baserunner coming from third ... by a mile ... for the final out. I kinda knew things weren't going to pan out after that.

Hey! There's a new rule in baseball!! Yeah, yeah. I just saw it with my own two eyes Apparently, if you're a baserunner caught in a rundown, you can throw an elbow into one of the players on the other team chasing you, fall down like you've been shot, and ... bingo! ... you're awarded an extra base!! Yeah, yeah. It just happened in the Rays-ChiSox game. Extra innings. One out. A.J. Pierzynski caught in a rundown. And out goes the elbow, brushing against Aybar (who was veering toward the outfield after tossing the ball to a teammate on the other side of A.J.) and ... boom ... down goes A.J. Off to third base with you then A.J. Nicely done. Excellent! Oh, and he just scored the winning run. Fitting. That's as bad as A-Rod flailing at the ball while running to first base against the BoSox in the playoffs. Terrible call. The umpiring crew needs to admit they blew it. They really do. Dip shits.