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The Worst Record In History of the World, Really


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I believe I have a copy of the worst recording ever made, ever, in the history of the world. Will Powers – Dancing for Mental Health. $.25 at the local thrift store. I was hoping to be amused, I was not prepared for the stunning weirdness that was pressed into vinyl back in 1983. The closest thing the “real world” I could compare it to is Laurie Anderson, but instead of singing about Sharky she is talking about how she picked herself up by her own boot-straps. The first track “Adventures in Success” consists of the following text being read over a very Tom-Tom Club sounding track.

It's you. Only you.

It's you. Only you.

It's you. Only you.

You are an important person. A rare individual. A unique creature. There has never been anyone just like you and never will be. You have talents and abilities no one else has. In some ways you're superior to any other living person. The power to do anything you can imagine is within you when you discover your real self by practicing a few simple laws of success.

First law of success. Take inventory of your assets. Don't be modest or critical. Be open and objective. Get a pencil and paper. Write down every good thins about yourself you can think of.

It's you. Make it habit. Make it happen. Only you.

It's you. Make it habit. Make it happen. Only you.

It's you. Make it habit. Make it happen. Only you.

Second law of success. Write a description of the person you'd like to be. Describe your personal dress, your home, your automobile, your desired occupation and income. Be honest. Now, go even deeper. Describe the inner person you'd like to be. Let your mind run wild. Assume you can become anything that you desire. The fact is, you will become the person you honestly describe. You can't avoid it.

It's you. Make it habit. Make it happen. Only you.

It's you. Make it habit. Make it happen. Only you.

It's you. Make it habit. Make it happen. Only you.

Third law of success. Concentrate on a mental image of the person you'd like to be. Paint a picture in your imagination of who you want to become. Constantly hold this visual in your mind's eye. See yourself performing and responding like a champion. Feel the confidence and courage that radiate from this type of person.

It's you. Only you.

It's you. Only you.

It's you. Only you.

These three laws are powerful and effective in changing lives. They'll work for you without fail if you're persistent in applying them.

Make it habit. Make it happen. Make it habit.

Make it happen. Make it habit. Make it happen.

Make it habit. Make it happen.

It's you. Make it habit. Make it happen. Only you.

It's you. Make it habit. Make it happen. Only you.

It's you. Make it habit. Make it happen. Only you.

Oh my god, it just gets weirder and weirder, that said it has a nice groove.

Bill

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I believe I have a copy of the worst recording ever made, ever, in the history of the world. Will Powers – Dancing for Mental Health. $.25 at the local thrift store. I was hoping to be amused, I was not prepared for the stunning weirdness that was pressed into vinyl back in 1983. The closest thing the “real world” I could compare it to is Laurie Anderson, but instead of singing about Sharky she is talking about how she picked herself up by her own boot-straps. The first track “Adventures in Success” consists of the following text being read over a very Tom-Tom Club sounding track.

It's you. Only you.

It's you. Only you.

It's you. Only you.

You are an important person. A rare individual. A unique creature. There has never been anyone just like you and never will be. You have talents and abilities no one else has. In some ways you're superior to any other living person. The power to do anything you can imagine is within you when you discover your real self by practicing a few simple laws of success.

First law of success. Take inventory of your assets. Don't be modest or critical. Be open and objective. Get a pencil and paper. Write down every good thins about yourself you can think of.

It's you. Make it habit. Make it happen. Only you.

It's you. Make it habit. Make it happen. Only you.

It's you. Make it habit. Make it happen. Only you.

Second law of success. Write a description of the person you'd like to be. Describe your personal dress, your home, your automobile, your desired occupation and income. Be honest. Now, go even deeper. Describe the inner person you'd like to be. Let your mind run wild. Assume you can become anything that you desire. The fact is, you will become the person you honestly describe. You can't avoid it.

It's you. Make it habit. Make it happen. Only you.

It's you. Make it habit. Make it happen. Only you.

It's you. Make it habit. Make it happen. Only you.

Third law of success. Concentrate on a mental image of the person you'd like to be. Paint a picture in your imagination of who you want to become. Constantly hold this visual in your mind's eye. See yourself performing and responding like a champion. Feel the confidence and courage that radiate from this type of person.

It's you. Only you.

It's you. Only you.

It's you. Only you.

These three laws are powerful and effective in changing lives. They'll work for you without fail if you're persistent in applying them.

Make it habit. Make it happen. Make it habit.

Make it happen. Make it habit. Make it happen.

Make it habit. Make it happen.

It's you. Make it habit. Make it happen. Only you.

It's you. Make it habit. Make it happen. Only you.

It's you. Make it habit. Make it happen. Only you.

Oh my god, it just gets weirder and weirder, that said it has a nice groove.

Bill

Please tell me you took those lyrics from the jacket and didn't actually transcribe them. :wacko:

:g

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I believe I have a copy of the worst recording ever made, ever, in the history of the world. Will Powers – Dancing for Mental Health. $.25 at the local thrift store. I was hoping to be amused, I was not prepared for the stunning weirdness that was pressed into vinyl back in 1983. The closest thing the “real world” I could compare it to is Laurie Anderson, but instead of singing about Sharky she is talking about how she picked herself up by her own boot-straps. The first track “Adventures in Success” consists of the following text being read over a very Tom-Tom Club sounding track.

It's you. Only you.

It's you. Only you.

It's you. Only you.

You are an important person. A rare individual. A unique creature. There has never been anyone just like you and never will be. You have talents and abilities no one else has. In some ways you're superior to any other living person. The power to do anything you can imagine is within you when you discover your real self by practicing a few simple laws of success.

First law of success. Take inventory of your assets. Don't be modest or critical. Be open and objective. Get a pencil and paper. Write down every good thins about yourself you can think of.

It's you. Make it habit. Make it happen. Only you.

It's you. Make it habit. Make it happen. Only you.

It's you. Make it habit. Make it happen. Only you.

Second law of success. Write a description of the person you'd like to be. Describe your personal dress, your home, your automobile, your desired occupation and income. Be honest. Now, go even deeper. Describe the inner person you'd like to be. Let your mind run wild. Assume you can become anything that you desire. The fact is, you will become the person you honestly describe. You can't avoid it.

It's you. Make it habit. Make it happen. Only you.

It's you. Make it habit. Make it happen. Only you.

It's you. Make it habit. Make it happen. Only you.

Third law of success. Concentrate on a mental image of the person you'd like to be. Paint a picture in your imagination of who you want to become. Constantly hold this visual in your mind's eye. See yourself performing and responding like a champion. Feel the confidence and courage that radiate from this type of person.

It's you. Only you.

It's you. Only you.

It's you. Only you.

These three laws are powerful and effective in changing lives. They'll work for you without fail if you're persistent in applying them.

Make it habit. Make it happen. Make it habit.

Make it happen. Make it habit. Make it happen.

Make it habit. Make it happen.

It's you. Make it habit. Make it happen. Only you.

It's you. Make it habit. Make it happen. Only you.

It's you. Make it habit. Make it happen. Only you.

Oh my god, it just gets weirder and weirder, that said it has a nice groove.

Bill

I laughed when I saw the thread title but after seeing the lyrics I realized that this used to be played regularly on a show on WBAI FM---a listener-sponsored, progressive institution here in NY since 1960 . Sorry, can't remember the show but it was an overnight slot.

As soon as I saw "First rule of success" I knew. Only back then it wasn't funny, but annoying and seemed pretentious.

This reminds me---don't ask why---of a guy I used to know who had a very minor disco hit called---I shit you not---Savage Lover--- around the same period, early '80s. Not a bad guy, either. Probably a decent musician, too, as I recall. My other friend and I cracked up and made endless fun of his tune, though. Then one day I was watching SCTV and there it was as background to a sketch. I almost had apoplexy, I laughed so hard.

But one night this un-named guy, our mutual friend and his wife, and un-named's new girlfriend Holly went out to eat. His girl, packed like a dollop of sherbert into her jeans and also with the I.Q. of sherbert, didn't say two words to me (or much more to anyone else) all night.

Until I accidently brushed up against a vegetable from a common plate we all were sampling from.

Then Holly suddenly became quite animated, turned to me, her eyes aflame and uttered these now-immortal words:

"You touched it, now eat it, scumbag!"

:party::party: Yow, Holly! Yow Savage Lover! Yow the Reagan years!!

Edited by fasstrack
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It's hard to top this....

.........AC

Someone posted something about them on another board. They are for real, for good or for bad, and the lead singer, Seth Putnam, is a real piece of work. Their 'hatin' on' lyrics are intended to shock but, according to Putnam, not to be taken seriously. Some even cracked me up. Anyway, if anyone can understand WTF he's singing without an interpreter they're a bloody genius.

Anyway, some of their CD titles are pretty funny, like 'I Like it When You Die'. Tune titles include 'I just Ran Over your Dog'.

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