RonF Posted January 5, 2005 Report Share Posted January 5, 2005 SHIT HAPPENS Taoism: Shit happens. Buddhism: If shit happens, it¹s not really shit. Zen Buddhism: Shit is, and isn¹t. Zen Buddhism #2: What is the sound of shit happening? Confucianism: Confucius says, "Shit must happen." Hinduism: This shit has happened before. Islam: Shit is the will of Allah. Catholicism: When shit happens, you deserved it. Protestantism: If it¹s shit, it¹s the Catholics. Presbyterian: This shit was bound to happen. Episcopalian: It's not so bad when shit happens, so long as you serve the right wine with it. Methodist: It's not so bad when shit happens--you¹re going to hell anyway. Baptist: You better believe it¹s shit! Congregationalist: Shit that happens to one person is just as good as shit that happens to another. Unitarian: Shit that happens to one person is just as lousy as shit that happens to another. Lutheran: If shit happens, shut up. Fundamentalism: If you¹re born-again, it can¹t be your shit happening. Fundamentalism #2: Shit can only be born again. Judaism: Why does this shit always happen to us? Calvinism: Shit happens because you don't work enough. Seventh-Day Adventism: No shit shall happen until Saturday. Mormonism: Shit is God¹s gift happening. Christian Science: If shit happens, it¹s all in your mind. Quakers: We didn¹t start this shit. Scientology: When shit happens, re-read "Dianetics" Jehovah's Witnesses: >Knock< >Knock< Shit happens. Jehovah's Witnesses #2: Shit has been prophesied and is imminent; only the righteous shall survive its happening. Moonies: Only super happy shit happens. Hare Krishna: Shit shit happens happens rama rama. Secular Humanism: Tomorrow it won¹t be shit. Utopianism: When it happens, shit does not stink. Creationism: God begat shit. Darwinism: This shit was once food. Stoicism: Shit is good for me. Idolism: This shit should be bronzed. Hedonism: There oughtta be more shit happening. Wiccan: Let shit happen. Satanism: SNEPPAH TIHS. Capitalism: That's MY shit. Communism: It's everybody's shit. Feminism: Men are shit. Chauvinism: The ladies love my shit... Commercialism: Let's package this shit. Impressionism: From a distance, shit looks like a garden. Existentialism: What is shit, anyway? Rastafarianism: Smoke that shit! Zoroastrianism: Shit happens half the time. Recovery program: Deal with shit one day at a time. Agnostic: Did someone shit? Atheism: I can't believe this shit! Nihilism: No shit. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DTMX Posted January 5, 2005 Report Share Posted January 5, 2005 Aww, shit. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
king ubu Posted January 5, 2005 Report Share Posted January 5, 2005 holy shit! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
7/4 Posted January 5, 2005 Report Share Posted January 5, 2005 no shit! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mgraham333 Posted January 5, 2005 Report Share Posted January 5, 2005 "I'm getting too old for this shit." - Danny Glover as Roger Murtaugh in Lethal Weapon Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
brownie Posted January 5, 2005 Report Share Posted January 5, 2005 holy shit! Shouldn't this be: MERDRE! Merde alors! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AfricaBrass Posted January 5, 2005 Report Share Posted January 5, 2005 It's happening! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
king ubu Posted January 5, 2005 Report Share Posted January 5, 2005 holy shit! Shouldn't this be: MERDRE! Merde alors! Yep, but what's that - saying "merd®e" brings luck? But only if you don't say anything after someone said "merd®e"? At least that's what that Saigner (or is it Seigner?) lady says in "Frantic", right? de par ma chandelle verte! ubu Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
7/4 Posted January 5, 2005 Report Share Posted January 5, 2005 (edited) It's happening! And here's some happening shit: Edited January 5, 2005 by 7/4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Harold_Z Posted January 5, 2005 Report Share Posted January 5, 2005 (edited) This thread is fulla shit !! Edited January 5, 2005 by Harold_Z Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AfricaBrass Posted January 5, 2005 Report Share Posted January 5, 2005 It's happening! And here's some happening shit: No shit! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
7/4 Posted January 5, 2005 Report Share Posted January 5, 2005 It's happening! And here's some happening shit: No shit! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ed S Posted January 5, 2005 Report Share Posted January 5, 2005 No time to post. Gotta go......... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
7/4 Posted January 5, 2005 Report Share Posted January 5, 2005 This thread is fulla shit !! hey man, don't be so negative. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Uncle Skid Posted January 5, 2005 Report Share Posted January 5, 2005 Mosaicism: I had to buy it -- that shit was on LAST CHANCE!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mikeweil Posted January 5, 2005 Report Share Posted January 5, 2005 Now where's the fan? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
7/4 Posted January 5, 2005 Report Share Posted January 5, 2005 Maybe we can harness this natural energy for the good of all mankind. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
couw Posted January 5, 2005 Report Share Posted January 5, 2005 biogas Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Harold_Z Posted January 6, 2005 Report Share Posted January 6, 2005 This thread is fulla shit !! hey man, don't be so negative. I was just trying to be observant. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PHILLYQ Posted January 6, 2005 Report Share Posted January 6, 2005 Is this thread the followup to Matrix Farts? http://www.wimp.com/matrixfarts/ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
7/4 Posted January 6, 2005 Report Share Posted January 6, 2005 Is this thread the followup to Matrix Farts? http://www.wimp.com/matrixfarts/ Thanks for clearing the air on this thread... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BruceH Posted January 6, 2005 Report Share Posted January 6, 2005 Who gives a shit? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BruceH Posted January 6, 2005 Report Share Posted January 6, 2005 Scientific Mindset: I have a theory about this shit... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brad Posted January 6, 2005 Report Share Posted January 6, 2005 This is a crappy thread. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Harold_Z Posted January 6, 2005 Report Share Posted January 6, 2005 This is a crappy thread. Yeah...this thread STINKS ! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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