T.D.

Eldridge Cleaver David Soul Vanilla Ice

If using testosterone in an effort to combat testicular cancer is "doping" then we two have glaringly different definitions for the term. Uh, where did I say "doping"? I was in fact quoting Armstrong, who has said many times when interviewed by cycling journalists, "I have never used banned substances." Plonk.

Some funny recent cycling dope items. I've copied/pasted rather than give links, because they're buried in longer pages. It appears that doping has been rampant in pro cycling. But of course we know that LANCE never used banned substances! 1) From cyclingnews.com today (Tuesday): Vandenbroucke fought with equal dirty weapons Frank Vandenbroucke said he only took the same stuff as the second placed rider... Photo ©: Roberto Bettini (Click for larger image) Frank Vandenbroucke said that he won Liège-Bastogne-Liège in 1999 "honestly", because he and all the other top riders were all using the same doping preparations. In an interview with the Belgian men's magazine Che, he said, he won the race "in an honest manner. Because I am 100 percent certain that I had taken nothing differently that day than the second, the third, the fourth and the fifth place finishers. Everyone rode with the same thing in himself, we fought with equal weapons. "Therefore it was an honest race, with an honest result. That day, or rather that year, I was the best of all. Everybody in the peloton knew it." The 34-year-old said that new drugs were introduced into the peloton by "pioneers". According to HLN.be, which reported the interview, he said that the Italian team Gewiss "was the EPO pioneer, everyone knew that. Furlan, Berzin, Argentin ... there is a reason why at a certain moment some men are riding 10 kilometre per hour faster than the others." Vandenbroucke, who will ride this season for the Belgian-Australian Continental team Fuga-Down Under, regretted never having "had the chance to be a pioneer, to try out new doping products first." He said that if he had had the chance, he "would have done it without doubt. .... Everyone would have seized that chance. Nobody should be hypocritical about that!" Some of his major victories did come while he was not doped, Vandenbroucke insisted. In 1994 he won the Queen Stage of the Tour Méditerranéen, ahead of riders "with a hematocrit of 60. Mine was 42!" Vandenbroucke ranked that mountaintop finish as greater than his later win in L-B-L. "Because I fought them with unequal resource. They had been prepared by their doping doctors Michele Ferrari and Luigi Cecchini. Whereas I ... I rode, so to speak, on bread and water."(SW) 2) From cyclingnews.com Monday: Jaksche allegedly named big names By Susan Westemeyer Jörg Jaksche allegedly named some names during his 2007 interrogation Photo ©: Luc Claessen (Click for larger image) Jörg Jaksche is said to have named names in his interrogation by the German Bundeskriminalamt (federal police) in July 2007, names which include individuals still active in cycling, such as Rudy Pevenage and Bjarne Riis. In July 2007, Jaksche confessed to having been a customer of Operación Puerto's Dr. Eufemiano Fuentes. According to the German tabloid Bild am Sonntag, the German rider was interrogated on July 25 and 26, 2007, for ten hours each day. This weekend, the publication claimed to have received a copy of the transcript of the interrogations. He is said to have named his former team manger at then-Team CSC, Bjarne Riis, former Telekom team manager Rudy Pevenage (now with Rock Racing), former Telekom team doctors Andreas Schmid and Lothar Heinrich, and Spanish doctor Eufemiano Fuentes, among others. In addition, Jaksche apparently claimed that he paid Pevenage for doping products in the Vuelta a España 1999. According to Bild, Pevenage gave him EPO every two days. In addition, Pevenage and Heinrich allegedly told him to ride the Tour de Suisse that year without any doping, as police investigations were expected. The tabloid claims that while at Telekom, Jaksche used EPO, growth hormones, Synachten and cortisone. Jaksche rode for Riis and Team CSC in 2004. During this time, according to Bild, Riis decided who should take how much of what product, with Jaksche saying how he was helped to avoid a positive doping control. Team Saxo Bank did not have a comment on the story. He also is alleged to have claimed that Claudio Sprenger, who was team doctor at Team Polti for Jaksche's first two pro years, 1997 and 1998, injected him with insulin. Sprenger, who is now team doctor for Team Milram, denied the claim. "It's one man's word against the other. Dr. Sprenger tells us that there is nothing to these charges. We are looking into it," Milram spokesman Max Biermann told cyclingnews. Jaksche would neither confirm nor deny the statements, telling the dpa press agency that he had not released the information, and that any subsequent investigations had already been closed.

Not all the Armstrong dope talk is Euro in origin... Here's a funny photo montage of LANCE and a fat dope heckler at the Tour of Cali. Or is the snowy fattie a French tourist?

H. A. Rey Travis the Chimp Sean Delonas (New York Post racist cartoonist)

Bob Brookmeyer Alejandro Valverde Dr. Eufemio Fuentes

No question, Wodehouse wouldn't even get a sniff of the top ten on an American list! But I'm surprised by the overlap: I'm pretty sure Catch-22, Confederacy of Dunces and Hitchhiker's Guide (OK, I haven't read the latter...) would make the US list.

Agreed that Joy [Jeeves] in the Morning and some suitable Blandings title are essential Wodehouse. But I won't argue with the list. Happy to see Wodehouse represented with two of the ten.

I've read five of the ten: the Wodehouses, Catch-22, Confederacy of Dunces and Lucky Jim. Seem like reasonable choices. I'm slightly more partial to the Wodehouse novels featuring Uncle Fred, and Confederacy of Dunces, while side-splitting on first reading, has a rather sad and depressing undertone if reread.

Why the Armstrong comeback? I dunno. Complete mystery to me. Cancellara? I'd never be surprised by any professional athlete testing positive. Under the general principle that one has to dope in order to medal in any major international competition (Worlds ITT in his case), certainly not. But I enjoy seeing Cancellara do well, since his listed height and weight are almost exactly the same as mine (and I'm a horrid cyclist, btw).

never got around to checking out more than the one i'v read (missionary stew) but he is indead a pretty good alternative to chandler (or maybe ambler?) Missionary Stew is one of the three I've read. Also The Fools in Town are On Our Side (which is really wild, best of the three) and Ah, Treachery. Not so sure about Ambler comparison, as the novels' geographical and time scope is usually wider, and the protagonists considerably less naive/innocent. Thomas also reminds me a bit of Richard Condon (Manchurian Candidate, Winter Kills, Prizzi's Honor), with the satire, cynicism and Cold War setting.

From the Chessbase site (courtesy Frederic Friedel): [Cuban GM] Leinier Dominguez with his girlfriend Yisel Martinez I had the following exchange with this young lady: "So where are you from, Yisel?" – "Cuba. Actually from the same village as Leinier." – "And what do you do? What is your profession?" – "I am an atomic physicist." – "You are a WHAT?" – "You know, Frederic: atom? Boom!" – "Yes, I know what an atomic or nuclear physicist is. But are you really one?" – "Sure, why not?" – "Okay, sorry to do this, but can you tell me what a Large Hadron Collider is?" – "You mean the LHC? Well, I actually worked at CERN..." There followed an intense exchange in which I told her about my fears that the LHC might be a deadly threat to humankind. "No, no, don't worry," she said. "On the one hand it is highly unlikely – practically impossible – that dangerous black holes will be produced, the kind that last longer than microseconds before they evaporate due to Hawking radiation. And secondly they will never get it to run. The whole machine is too complicated, it will keep failing until they give up." Yep, she is the real thing. Later that evening I told a friend about this conversation. "Why didn't I know this?" he groaned. "They were sitting at the next table at the closing dinner and I did not join them! I could have spent hours discussing particle physics with her, and instead had an evening listening to missed chances in an Open Catalan."

Have been reading some new (to me) fiction authors: David Liss: The Coffee Trader and A Conspiracy of Paper are very enjoyable, I'd categorize them as "historical financial thrillers." Well-written and seemingly well-researched. Ross Thomas: Can't believe I never read any of his novels before. Rather Chandleresque, "satirical thrillers" with a sense of humor and heavy doses of international travel, politics, rogue military and intelligence officers, conniving and double-crossing. Complex plots and an enviably clear writing style.

Trip down memory lane: Even if you originally read it, Verducci's 2002 Sports Illustrated MLB/PED article is still worth a look... And a funny 2005 article on the oft-overlooked amphetamines.

Nobody would really surprise me. Pujols not at all: not that I've heard rumors or anything, it's just that his physique looks so pumped-up.

Porter Waggoner Frank Butler Jeeves

Earlier than the mid-'90s. I recall reading articles / hearing speculation about McGwire, Canseco and steroids back in the late '80s, when they were A's teammates. And Fay Vincent delivered an anti-steroids memo to each club and the players' union on June 7, 1991. Laughably, Selig reissued Vincent's statement on May 15, 1997 (source: Selena Roberts article on A-Hole-Rod in latest Sports Illustrated)! Bud's the owners' creature, and they apparently feel he's doing a decent job, hence the $18MM paycheck...

Just received the latest entry in my yourmusic queue: Curtis Fuller, The Opener

Probably ought to wait for confirmation from a better source than a tabloid gossip column...

Considered one of baseball's greatest second basemen, Alomar stirred controversy in 1996 by spitting in the face of umpire John Hirschbeck. The incident prompted fellow ump Al Clark to say, "If I were John, I'd insist that Robbie Alomar take an AIDS test." I recall the spitting incident. It was revealed shortly thereafter that Alomar spit in the umpire's face because, during a pitched on-field rhubarb, Hirschbeck called Alomar a "faggot."

Yup, and it was weight machine by Nautilus that changed attitudes in baseball. Working with dumbbells could lead to too much bulk, but by using a machine like Nautilus, or perhaps because such a machine required some initial instruction, it was possible for baseball players to add muscle without becoming too bulky. Not just weight lifting, but also general changes to hitting technique. At the same time players started lifting weights, they also started focusing on "bat speed", using much lighter bats with thin handles and fat barrels, and whipping the bat through the hitting zone very quickly. The changes were pretty dramatic: old-time players used big heavy telephone-pole bats, while current MLB bats often weigh no more than models I used in Little League. [Added] Tejada to "apologize" to Congress. More vindication for Canseco!

Disclaimer: I don't watch TV, and won't see the interview. But, as a former New Yorker, I figure A-Hole-Rod had to confess. Otherwise the NY media would have hounded him to death. The prior confessions by Pettitte and Giambi, and the mild fan reaction thereto, were probably also factors in the decision. Re. Canseco: Hey, I'll never deny he's a buffoonish dolt, but I always believed the book (I even read the damn thing!). Were any libel suits ever filed?

Not too big a surprise, but what I'd really like to see is a detailed report of Abramovich's finances. He must have lost a whole lot of money recently.

Word.

I live about 50 mi. W of the Hudson Valley Mall, and it's by no means dead. To the extent I shop at malls (practically not at all, as they make me very uncomfortable), I go there: I've been to Best Buy, Target and Dick's Sporting Goods a couple of times each. One non-cultural reason for discomfort: a couple of years ago, some nut with a rifle randomly shot several people at that mall! I can say that the site's coverage of the King's Mall (less than a mile down the road from Hudson Valley Mall, it's very depressing), Dutchess Mall and Mall at New Rochelle is very accurate.