T.D.

Stilton Cheesewright Oofy Prosser Pongo Twistleton

I'm not the sharpest tool in the shed, but isn't offense the Bears' big problem? Gee whiz, the QB situation is awful. When I see the Bears on TV, the offense doesn't even look up to NFL standards. Funny thing, but I grew up in the Chicago area, and the Bears have almost always had rotten QBs. I recall non-entities like Jack Concannon, Bobby Douglass (would've been a better RB), Virgil Carter,... Jim McMahon's about the only significant QB they've had for decades. It's really strange. Agreed, Chicago fans are enablers. When I moved to the East Coast, the NY fans' emphasis on winning, though kind of obnoxious, was a real sea change. Chicago is a great sports town, though.

I think the key for the Lions is new management and coaching. Gotta change everything, top to bottom, to break the culture of losing. I don't think bringing in a young offense-minded coach like Garrett, while leaving the personnel/management side intact, would be successful. With the right hires, the thing could turn around, but it'd likely take a couple of years. Miami turned 1-15 around in a single season, but that was a flukily bad year, not extension of a longstanding tradition. On the coaching side, Giant defensive coordinator Spagnuolo (sp?) is going to be a hot candidate. I'm more concerned with the GM/personnel side, though.

Antonio Lopez de Santa Anna Chinook Marion Tinsley

Indianapolis Baltimore Philly Atlanta This is a very tough wild card week. All four road teams are favored, and the point spreads I saw are slender (two ones and two threes). I'll hold my nose and stick with the favorites, though picking four road teams looks rather dubious. Plenty of potential traps, too: going with Dungy after a bye week, going with two rookie QBs (Ryan, Flacco) on the road, and SD looks kinda dangerous (for one week only; if they win, they'll get killed in the divisional round)... Compensating factors are that the Eagles look solid, P. Manning is en fuego, Baltimore should beat up on Pennington, and Arizona stinks.

Desmond Tutu Tete Montoliu Bodacious Tatas (there was a racehorse by that name back in the '80s)

Joe Pesci Rybka (it's the world's strongest computer chess program) Abe Vigoda

The Cowboy collapse surprised me. I figured they'd lose in Philly, but not in such an ugly way. I'm more or less a Cowboy hater (kudos to Jerry Jones here), but the meltdown was even painful for me to watch. Coach firings: Marinelli had to go (you have to get rid of all traces of an 0-16 season). Also Crennel, just based on his record (and I'm a longtime fan of all the Giant Parcells alumni). Mangini was less clear, but it's New York and there were some warning signs. Trouble is, the Jets bet the ranch on a bunch of veteran free-agent signings, and that rarely seems to work in the NFL. Great job by the Dolphins, but I felt Parcells maneuvered himself into a great job. Last year's 1-15 was a freakish meltdown, and I thought the Fish could go 7-9 to 9-7 this year with minimal changes. Still, Parcells, Sparano et al. got it done...I'm very happy for Pennington (a very classy guy), although I felt his arm just wasn't strong enough for the Jets.

William S. Burroughs Steely Dan Steeleye Span

The most recent Sports Illustrated had a one-paragraph remembrance of Fischer, along with an excellent full-page B/W photo.

Ray "Boom Boom" Mancini Bobby Chacon Warren Zevon

Real find in my semi-local brick-and-mortar CD shop: used copy of Frank Rosolino's Free For All for $7.99! CD purchases have been rare lately, but I had to jump on this.

Happy Birthday! :party: But I gotta say your self-immolation avatar has been creeping me out...

Like Jerry will ever let THAT happen. Holmgren's retiring, and I don't think he'd want to put up with Jones's antics anyway. (I'm not that high on him as a coach, but what do I know?) Living in NY State and occasionally reading NYC tabloids, I'm very familiar with the "hire the biggest name out there" strategy. Cowher fits from that perspective, and Jones hired Parcells before, so I wouldn't rule Cowher out. But I'm not sure Cowher'd take the job, even if they threw piles of money at him: as an owner/boss Jones couldn't be a bigger contrast to the Rooney family...

I think Reid might keep his job if the Eagles beat Dallas next week. How about Zorn? I definitely think he should stay on, but there has been speculation (after JZ's recent self-critical comments) that (the unpredictable) Snyder could replace him.

He's a Scott Boras client, no? I thought that basically means signing for the most money. (In the financial world, that'd mean highest net present value of the contract under suitable assumptions; I'm not certain the sports world is always that sophisticated...[Added] OK, Boras probably is.)

Interesting article. I had always thought Orff was an out-and-out Nazi. Looks like the real story is somewhat more complex, but he still seems like a dirtbag.

Deng Xiaopeng Dan Shittu Raymond "Poupou" Poulidor

Wow, Tennessee just surprised by doing a number on the Steelers. Didn't see the game, but box score suggests that Titans played error-free ball and capitalized on turnovers.

Possibly. Giants are definitely fading and could make an early postseason exit, but Dallas will have to get their shit together and win at Philly next week just to get in the playoffs.

What do you think the Cowboys will do in the off-season? "Back up the truck" and make wholesale changes? I doubt they can, because such a prominent team, going into a new stadium, can't afford a rebuilding year. That seems to suggest coach firings. But I won't even try to predict Jones's strategy...

Charles Dodgson Jerry Dodgion Ion Tiriac

Mr Bean Coleman Hawkins Jim Beam Max Planck Bill Raftery Frank Sinatra

RIP. Never read his book (perhaps I should have!), but I recall Ellis, going back to the late '60s, as a big-Afro'd free spirit and even kind of a countercultural figure. He famously claimed to have been tripping when he threw his no-hitter. Despite his time with Texas, NYY and Oakland, I always thought of him as a Pirate.

Only if you insult Conn mercilessly. Although a certain consensus seems to have developed regarding Conn's er, dickhood , I get along with him well because we're both interested in chess. So no insults other than the allusion just made... But I won the playoff pool a couple of years ago (again without being in the regular season competition), so contestants might want revenge.