GA Russell

Did you hear about the Newfie who was killed while ice fishing? He got run over by the zamboni.

When I was a boy I only had two friends, and they were imaginary. And they would only play with each other.

I went on a date recently, and I took her horseback riding. That was kind of fun until I ran out of quarters.

Andrew Harris has signed with the Argos. https://3downnation.com/2022/02/10/disrespectful-andrew-harris-explains-split-from-bombers-after-last-ditch-offer-out-of-nowhere/ https://3downnation.com/2022/02/11/breaking-up-is-hard-to-do-messy-split-between-bombers-harris-should-have-been-avoided/ ***** The late Sam Mills has been elected to the Canton Hall of Fame. I remember him well when he was with the Philly Stars. What I didn't know was that the year before joining the Stars, he was an Argo training camp cut! https://3downnation.com/2022/02/10/linebacker-sam-mills-once-cut-by-the-toronto-argonauts-enshrined-in-pro-football-hall-of-fame/ ***** Derrick Moncrief has signed with the Roughriders. https://3downnation.com/2022/02/11/out-with-the-new-and-in-with-the-old-riders-reach-into-chris-jones-past-with-derrick-moncrief-signing/ ***** John Hodge picks his six favorite free agent signings. https://3downnation.com/2022/02/12/the-six-best-cfl-free-agent-signings/ ***** Ottawa analysis https://3downnation.com/2022/02/14/enter-expectations-exit-excuses-analyzing-the-redblacks-retool/ ***** The league has announced these dates: Combines...March 10, 11, 18 and 25-27. Amateur Draft...May 3. Rookie camps open May 11. Rosters down to 85...May 14. Traing camps open May 15. Rosters down to 75...May 17. https://3downnation.com/2022/02/14/cfl-unveils-dates-for-2022-combines-national-draft-start-of-training-camp/

I saw yesterday that the Yankees will retire Paul O'Neill's number. Was he that good? https://nypost.com/2022/02/23/paul-oneill-stunned-yankees-are-retiring-his-number/

I wouldn't mind paying taxes, if I knew they were going to a friendly country.

Let's catch up a little bit Speedy Banks has signed with the Argos. https://3downnation.com/2022/02/13/speedy-b-to-toronto-argos-sign-longtime-ticats-playmaker-brandon-banks/ https://3downnation.com/2022/02/16/i-definitely-knew-right-after-grey-cup-what-was-up-brandon-banks-saw-writing-on-the-wall-in-hamilton/ https://3downnation.com/2022/02/17/brandon-banks-argos/ ***** Jeremiah Masoli has signed with the Redblacks. https://www.cbc.ca/sports/football/cfl/ottawa-redblacks-announce-signing-of-masoli-1.6342964 https://3downnation.com/2022/02/04/ottawa-swearing-in-redblacks-agree-to-terms-with-quarterback-jeremiah-masoli/ ***** Duron Carter has signed with the Elks (rejoining Chris Jones) as a defensive back! https://3downnation.com/2022/02/14/hes-back-edmonton-elks-sign-duron-carter-will-play-him-at-defensive-back/ https://3downnation.com/2022/02/15/duron-carter-believes-size-smarts-will-help-him-at-db-i-would-be-scared-to-go-up-against-myself/ ***** Jon Gott has retired. https://3downnation.com/2022/02/04/never-too-late-to-say-goodbye-beer-chugging-ol-jon-gott-officially-retires-as-a-redblack/ ***** Micah Johnson has signed with the Ticats. https://3downnation.com/2022/02/05/ticats-dt-micah-johnson-agree-to-terms-on-one-year-deal-report/ ***** Jaelon Acklon will follow Masoli to Ottawa. https://3downnation.com/2022/02/05/r-united-receiver-jaelon-acklin-indicates-he-will-join-former-qb-masoli-in-ottawa-with-twitter-video/ ***** Lucheiz Purifoy has signed with BC. https://3downnation.com/2022/02/05/back-where-it-all-began-riders-db-loucheiz-purifoy-announces-commitment-to-b-c-lions/ https://3downnation.com/2022/02/08/back-in-the-den-b-c-lions-bring-back-db-loucheiz-purifoy/ ***** William Powell has signed with the Redblacks. https://3downnation.com/2022/02/05/coming-home-riders-rb-william-powell-announces-return-to-the-redblacks/ ***** Ed Gainey has signed with the Elks. https://3downnation.com/2022/02/06/former-riders-veteran-defensive-back-ed-gainey-agrees-to-terms-with-edmonton-elks/ ***** Hamilton has finalized its coaching staff. https://3downnation.com/2022/02/07/ticats-finalize-coaching-staff-promote-craig-butler-to-special-teams-coordinator/ ***** Hergy Mayala has signed with the Alouettes. https://3downnation.com/2022/02/08/former-first-round-pick-canadian-rec-hergy-mayala-signs-with-montreal-alouettes/ ***** Delvin Breaux is coming out of retirement to play for BC. https://3downnation.com/2022/02/08/b-c-lions-agree-to-terms-with-longtime-tiger-cats-defensive-back-delvin-breaux/ ***** Ja'Gared Davis has signed with the Argos. https://3downnation.com/2022/02/08/official-argos-steal-dominant-dl-jagared-davis-from-ontario-rival/

When a cop arrests a mime, does he tell him he has the right to remain silent?

Having children gives your life purpose. Right now, my purpose is to get some sleep.

At 10:22 this evening, it will be 22:22 on 2/22/22. ***** Let's revisit the league's list of free agent signings. I like it because it is up to date, and because it lists whom the teams lost as well as those they gained. https://www.cfl.ca/2022/02/08/sudden-impact-team-team-look-free-agency-5/ More on this later.

In this country, you're guilty until proven wealthy.

Maybe just once someone will call me "sir" without adding "you're making a scene."

A hooker told me she would do anything for $50. I said, "Paint my house."

A recent police study showed that you are much more likely to get shot by a fat cop if you run.

My neighbors love me for playing the piano. They break my window to hear me better.

RIP. It's hard to be funny over such an extended period.

I remember the Dynaflex records. Was their sound any worse than their competitors' at the time?

The only reason some people get lost in thought is because it's unfamiliar territory.

I saw on this nature show on TV how the male elk douses himself with urine to smell sweeter to the opposite sex. What a coincidence!

They say marriages are made in heaven. So are thunder and lightning.

All I ask is the chance to prove that money can't make me happy.

A poll showed that two out of five men would rather have love than money or health. Yeah, that's what a woman wants. A broke sick guy.

Yesterday was Free Agent Day. So let me put here a few links listing the day's events, starting with one last ranking of the top 40 players. https://3downnation.com/2022/02/08/top-xx-cfl-free-agents/ https://www.cfl.ca/2022/02/08/sudden-impact-team-team-look-free-agency-5/ https://3downnation.com/2022/02/08/2022-cfl-free-agency-live/ https://3downnation.com/2022/02/08/who-each-team-signed-and-lost-during-the-first-day-of-cfl-free-agency/ https://www.cbc.ca/sports/football/cfl/cfl-free-agency-1.6343922 https://www.cfl.ca/2022/02/08/oleary-breaking-day-1-free-agency/ https://www.cfl.ca/transactions https://www.cfl.ca/fa22/ ***** Here was the quarterback situation leading up to the big day. https://www.tsn.ca/cfl-qb-market-tracker-1.1754589 ***** It looks like BC is going to go with two Canadian quarterbacks. Since the current CFL corporation was formed in 1958, no one has gone with two Canadian QBs. https://3downnation.com/2022/02/08/canadian-qb-michael-oconnor-signs-with-b-c-lions/

Why do people say, "Life is short?" Life is the longest thing anyone ever does. What can you do that's longer?

The Four Freshmen The Kingston Trio The Beach Boys The Beatles