jazzypaul

Black Sam Bonney Like anyone confronted with the harshness of robbery on the high seas, you can be pessimistic at times. You can be a little bit unpredictable, but a pirate's life is far from full of certainties, so that fits in pretty well. Arr!

You think it's bad coming from customers? Up until recently, I kept getting that constantly from my own fucking band!!!!! These guys were self-taught, and therefore never took a music business class. This is why I consider the following to have been a blessing in disguise... About a month ago, we play a gig with a local rock band at an all-ages venue. Right off the bat, I'm leery of this proposition, as we'd be playing to a bunch of people that couldn't see us play anywhere else, and more than likely, wouldn't at all get what we're playing. But the other two kick and scream that we need this gig and besides, one of their friends from high school is in the other band. We're told that we'll get half of the door for the night, and once again, I'm not feeling good about this. Unless we're playing a place with A LOT of walk-in traffic, I have no yearning to play gigs for the door. So, we get there, and the other band asks us to play last. Okay, fair enough, we get to play for an extra half hour. That's fine. The other band tells us that they'll be bringing in about 100 people with them. Despite my best efforts, sure enough, everyone on our mailing list writes back to say, "what the hell, you're playing a place that doesn't serve alcohol? Hell no, I'm not coming!" By the time we start setting up, there are maybe 40 people in the place. By the middle of our second song, there are now 15 people there. Yeah, ummm, exposure. Right... So, we finish off the night, and I go to try to find the manager to go get paid. Lo and behold, he tells us that there's a contract, and the contract says that we'd get paid 80% of the door after 70 people pay admission. Can I see this contract? Nope, don't have one here. Who put out this contract? Oh...and he tells me the name that is more reviled than any on the Chicago music scene. I ask the kid who wanted us to play there why he didn't let us in on any of this. Oh, I didn't think it was important. WHAT!?!?!?! So, you had us play for 2 1/2 straight hours for free, because you didn't think it was important to let us know that the most crooked booking agent in town was booking a gig where we wouldn't see dime one until the club was 70% full? Ummm, when you say it like that it sounds a lot more important. No shit!!! Well, because our club manager has still yet to find a contract, I tell him he's got one minute to find the contract or I call the cops. All of the sudden, out comes this horrible, horrible contract which no one should ever, ever, agree to. Not only does the club not have to pay out until they get 70 people in the door, but on top of that, they don't have to provide food or drink for the band, and on top of that, for the privelege of getting to play under such shitty conditions, neither the club nor the promoter have to promote the show whatsoever. At first, the other two members of my beloved trio were like, "but dude, we got to play for some people that never heard us before!" At which point, I had to point out that those people simply got to ignore a band that they'd never gotten the pleasure of ignoring before (they were talking the entire time). "And what about the fact that we got to see Aaron (the nimrod from the other band) play?" Well, I would have much rather paid $5 to see him, not have to schlep my drums around on a Sunday night, and not have to deal with the fact that I just gave away my music to an ungrateful club owner and a bunch of ungrateful patrons who couldn't have given two shits that we were even there. I don't necessarily know what part or why that all sunk in with them, but since then, I've yet to hear them ask me about playing incredibly lame places for a cut of the door. However, next friday, we're playing at a pool hall...LOL...thankfully, the owner of said pool hall loves us and pays us out the wazoo, feeds us and lets us drink to our hearts content. However...this sunday...WE'RE PLAYING THE ELBO ROOM!!!! This is a huge room and an even more huge opportunity for us...wish me luck...

I didn't know muslims didn't agree with tombstones. I wonder what the thought is behind that one...

SGUD -- what's your take on downloading out of print or impossibly hard to find stuff?

I learned out of the Riley book, it's a damn good one.

Yes, Wes and Coltrane. Remember, the original John Coltrane group was supposedly supposed to be Wes, McCoy, Lee Morgan, insert your favorite bass player here and Billy Higgins. I guess Wes and Trane played together and Wes couldn't get with it, Lee cost too much and Trane just didn't like the way that him and Billy played together. Lucky for us.

I don't think that I ever consciously decide between forms of music. I'll end up on funk binges where there are a couple of weeks gone by where nothing has been in my CD player but P-Funk, James Brown, Curtis Mayfield Stevie Wonder and Tony Toni Tone, but even then, eventually, that'll turn into the Scorpion and Alive!, and then that turns into Search for the New Land and Night Dreamer, and then I come back home to The Shape of Jazz to Come and Crescent. I guess this is to say that I'm constantly changing it up, but never with an agenda...

I second the motion that johnny needs a hug. Desperately. As does Dan.

A few complaints... 1) All of Stevie's (Wonder, that is) 70's albums should have been in the top 20. No way are they less influential or less musically amazing than, umm, Nevermind, by Nirvana. 2) GregK: you were the one that asked why rap was included? My word, man...Let's face it, rap is part of the musical landscape, and let's face it, the best rappers throughout the years have put out some AMAZING music. If you can't hear it, that's YOUR problem, not mine. 3) Whoever bitched about Appetite for Destruction making the list? What are you smoking? Think about 1987 for a second. What else was out there? It was the bleakest of times musically. The only thing even close in the rock world was Bon Jovi. Then here comes this band out of L.A. that can actually rock the way a band is supposed to rock. Given when it came out, it was an incredibly important record. 4) I was happy just to see some jazz albums on the list. 5) No, anthologies should not have been on the list. That was cheating. 6) If I'm not mistaken, Marquee Moon by Television didn't make the list, but the fucking Ramones did. That's disgusting.

That incident convinced me that I really never need to shop at Wal-Mart again.

Don't you think the smartest thing Wal-Mart could have done would have been to give her a DVD player for all of her troubles? When you're so busy maintaining the bottom line that you can't even bring yourself to give merchandise to someone who was knocked unconscious in your store, you've got troubles...

I ran out and grabbed some Indian food before I came to work, so it was all about the Kingfisher with the Lamb Vindaloo. Oh yeah, Thanksgiving is not too bad at all...

Thank you sire... and thank you AB... and thank you Cat Shatner. My holidays are now complete.

judging from the picture, it looks like Wingy already got the girl...

Comedy Central is showing the South Park Movie uncut at midnight tomorrow night. Shore am glad I picked up the new digital cable package yesterday...hee hee...

And now for where I show my ignorance... If one wanted to steal one of these for an avatar because one saw one of his single favorite Donald Byrd albums used, how would one go about doing this? One wants to know.

My favorite Thanksgiving day film is the same as my favorite Christmas, Birthday, Flag Day, Groundhog's Day, St. Patrick's Day and St. Swithen's Day movie: Rounders.

Thanksgiving has always been my least favorite holiday. Why, you ask? Well, I'm allergic to poultry. Now, when I was a kid, this wasn't an issue. All of the people on my mom's side of the family were never fond of turkey, and on my dad's side, well, there's not many turkeys to be found in Morocco, so my grandmother never learned how to cook turkey...so it was always lamb. So, besides the weird looks from people when I'd tell them that our traditional thanksgiving feast was cous cous, malga and leg of lamb, it was excellent. Then, enter our very own personal Yoko. My uncle's second wife is all about tradition. And, after my grandparents moved out of their homey little joint in Chicago and came out to the suburbs, the uncle's and aunt's place became the place for holiday dinners. Well, as we all know, Thanksgiving traditions include turkey. Over everyone else's objections, a few years ago, she made a turkey, and nothing else. And everything had turkey broth in it. I was told this in advance, and I swore I wouldn't go to Thanksgiving dinner. Well, after hours of begging and pleading from various family members, I decided to come. Even though I'd be spending a couple of hours watching everyone else eat. These things don't sit well with me...so I stopped off at the local McDonald's and grabbed a Big Mac and a large coke, and then came to dinner. While everyone else was eating their Thanksgiving dinner, and now scowling at the aunt in question, I sat and chowed down on a big mac. Needless to say, it's been lamb every year since. But, now, I also get tons of grief from said aunt and uncle every year right around this time. And being that they are also my landlords (they own my condo), this is hardly my favorite time of year. Sorry to be a buzzkill...

Bring me to the table marked "it's the singer, not the song" as well. I've heard lame versions of caravan, and I've heard versions of caravan that would singe your chest hair. Personally, I've got enough decent versions of Caravan laying around the house that I never get tired of it. Now, as for tunes that I'd be happy if I never played again... There is no greater love Blue Monk (I'm the world's biggest Monk fan...whenever anyone calls this, I just think, "damn, is that the only Monk chart anyone knows?") All of Me Body and Soul and for emphasis' sake... There is no greater love

Well, I guess my being banned at AAJ was a big mistake. Turns out between Deep and Bombastic, there were 200 IP addresses. Having to go hog wild like that, you're bound to get a couple of innocent casualties in there as well. So, at least for me, all is well.

I'm not kidding. Mike never even e-mailed me to let me know it was going to happen. This is my last post in its entirety... I hate to jump on the free speech bandwagon on this one, but damn. And I was probably amongst the first 10 people at that board too, you know?

All I know is that I stood up for the guy, and now I've been banned from AAJ. I may have done many things in my day, but, man, I don't think I'd ever done anything to get myself banned from there...sigh...

If he's supposed to be Peter Pan, couldn't he just fly away? Okay, MJ joke in terrible taste of the day... Michael comes home to his boyfriend, who is weeping profusely on the couch. Michael asks his lover, "what's wrong?" The boyfriend looks up at him and says, "I was watching the TV, and they said you're a pedophile!!" Michael, looking stunned, says, "Pedophile! That's such a big word for a 6 year old!"

Mormon? Mormon? MORMON??? SHEEEEEEESH!! This, coming from a guy whose motto is "God's cool...his people suck." Damn...

In one of those incredibly rare cases, Bev and I agree. What she's saying about introduction through modern jazz is incredibly true. A tip of the hat to you, Bev...