Why did the chicken cross the road

[Van Basten II]

-_-

There's a chick i can dig .

[Christiern]

The one in the striped outfit ain't bad, either.

[RDK]

http://nerdnirvana.org/2007/02/25/snl-comm...luckin-chicken/

[Jazzmoose]

Joyce Kilmer:

I think that I shall never see

a chicken crossing roads like thee.

You first went here, then there, like that,

until that semi squashed you flat.

[Jazzmoose]

The one in the striped outfit ain't bad, either.

I dunno; looks like a lot of chemical additives in both...

[Swinging Swede]

Orrin Keepnews:

The expanded, although not unlimited, capacity of a road makes it possible for virtually the entire chicken to cross it. Since not quite the entire chicken could cross it - there simply is not that much room on a single road - the decision was to omit a leg and a wing. The producer has used his own judgement in selecting which limbs to cut off.

[Spontooneous]

Orrin Keepnews:

The expanded, although not unlimited, capacity of a road makes it possible for virtually the entire chicken to cross it. Since not quite the entire chicken could cross it - there simply is not that much room on a single road - the decision was to omit a leg and a wing. The producer has used his own judgement in selecting which limbs to cut off.

"This road is the most accurate representation to date of my work with the chicken."

[Dan Gould]

Orrin Keepnews:

The expanded, although not unlimited, capacity of a road makes it possible for virtually the entire chicken to cross it. Since not quite the entire chicken could cross it - there simply is not that much room on a single road - the decision was to omit a leg and a wing. The producer has used his own judgement in selecting which limbs to cut off.

Excellent, SS!

[Noj]

DUSTY GROOVE:

The Chicken - Crosses The Road

A definite trip to Kentucky with the chicken -- a bird who's really grown tremendously since we first saw it cross the road! The chicken has a much more mature stride across the road, and its calls definitely show that change -- a shift into tighter road-crossing than before, and a really solid cackle that has it blossoming greatly as a farm animal. We loved the chicken's first flutter across the road, but we're even more surprised at the second crossing -- a complicated mix of scratching claws and aviary spurts that really let the chicken open up its wings, especially over the double yellow line, which we really like a lot. There's some loose feathers floating around too -- and these come off very well, by pushing the chicken into freshly plucked territory, yet without some of the barbeque cliches of other contemporary chickens. All in all, there's a really unique feel to the road -- and although it's been years since the chicken's last crossing, it's clear the bird's been using all of that time to really develop itself as a farm animal! Titles include "Cornish Hen", "Brooklyn Rooster", "Cockadoodledoo", "Little Egg O' Mine", "It's OK To Pluck Me", "Chicken Scratchin'", "Broil Me, Baby", "Delectable", and "In The Henhouse".

[Shawn]

DUSTY GROOVE:

The Chicken - Crosses The Road

A definite trip to Kentucky with the chicken -- a bird who's really grown tremendously since we first saw it cross the road! The chicken has a much more mature stride across the road, and its calls definitely show that change -- a shift into tighter road-crossing than before, and a really solid cackle that has it blossoming greatly as a farm animal. We loved the chicken's first flutter across the road, but we're even more surprised at the second crossing -- a complicated mix of scratching claws and aviary spurts that really let the chicken open up its wings, especially over the double yellow line, which we really like a lot. There's some loose feathers floating around too -- and these come off very well, by pushing the chicken into freshly plucked territory, yet without some of the barbeque cliches of other contemporary chickens. All in all, there's a really unique feel to the road -- and although it's been years since the chicken's last crossing, it's clear the bird's been using all of that time to really develop itself as a farm animal! Titles include "Cornish Hen", "Brooklyn Rooster", "Cockadoodledoo", "Little Egg O' Mine", "It's OK To Pluck Me", "Chicken Scratchin'", "Broil Me, Baby", "Delectable", and "In The Henhouse".

Look for the new upcoming single: "My Cock Crows At Dawn".

[Dan Gould]

DUSTY GROOVE:

The Chicken - Crosses The Road

A definite trip to Kentucky with the chicken -- a bird who's really grown tremendously since we first saw it cross the road! The chicken has a much more mature stride across the road, and its calls definitely show that change -- a shift into tighter road-crossing than before, and a really solid cackle that has it blossoming greatly as a farm animal. We loved the chicken's first flutter across the road, but we're even more surprised at the second crossing -- a complicated mix of scratching claws and aviary spurts that really let the chicken open up its wings, especially over the double yellow line, which we really like a lot. There's some loose feathers floating around too -- and these come off very well, by pushing the chicken into freshly plucked territory, yet without some of the barbeque cliches of other contemporary chickens. All in all, there's a really unique feel to the road -- and although it's been years since the chicken's last crossing, it's clear the bird's been using all of that time to really develop itself as a farm animal! Titles include "Cornish Hen", "Brooklyn Rooster", "Cockadoodledoo", "Little Egg O' Mine", "It's OK To Pluck Me", "Chicken Scratchin'", "Broil Me, Baby", "Delectable", and "In The Henhouse".

Look for the new upcoming single: "My Cock Crows At Dawn".

Some parts are a little more well-done than we like, but its all juicy and finger-lookin' good!

[Alexander]

Emily Dickenson: Because I could not stop for the chicken

He kindly stopped for me.

[AllenLowe]

Lenny Bruce's wife: "Let your chicken get your dinner!" (after she caught him in the yard with said partner)

[Man with the Golden Arm]

for conn:

Bill Belichick: "I have no comment on whether I crossed the road or not but will only say that I am looking forward to possibly crossing the road better next week, but other than that I have no more to say." (crosses road off camera)

[Big Al]

LEONARD FEATHER: In my book The Encyclopedia of Chickens, I mentioned the promising talent of a chicken who was tentatively taking his first steps across the road. Since then, I've had the opportunity to work with the chicken and he has matured WAY past the mindless squawking of those who would call themselves the "new thing in chickens" or "avant gizzarde."

[Aggie87]

Kenny G: You know, Charlie Parker got his nickname because of his reed. It chirped like a chicken that was trying to cross the road, got hit by a car, and landed in some yard. Yardbird.

Interviewer: You really think that’s how Charlie Parker got his nickname? Interesting.

Kenny G: Of course. I study these things, you know. I play much more in tune than Parker did, too.

[Christiern]

Ken Burns: Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, there was this train...

[Hot Ptah]

Why did the chicken cross the road?

Sun Ra:

It was on the right road but it was going in the wrong direction. It was on the right road.

It was on the right road but it was going in the wrong direction. It was on the right road.

It was on the right road but it was going in the wrong direction. It was on the right road.

It was on the right road but it was going in the wrong direction. It was on the right road.

It was on the right road but it was going in the wrong direction. It was on the right road.

It was on the right road but it was going in the wrong direction. It was on the right road.

It was on the right road but it was going in the wrong direction. It was on the right road.

It was on the right road but it was going in the wrong direction. It was on the right road.

It was on the right road but it was going in the wrong direction. It was on the right road.

Ba, da da da-da-da da DA da. On the right road.

Ba, da da da-da-da da DA da. On the right road.

Ba, da da da-da-da da DA da. On the right road.

Ba, da da da-da-da da DA da. On the right road.

Ba, da da da-da-da da DA da. On the right road.

Ba, da da da-da-da da DA da. On the right road.

Ba, da da da-da-da da DA da. On the right road.

Ba, da da da-da-da da DA da. On the right road.

[JSngry]

Movie Review

Poultrygeist: Night of the Chicken Dead (2007)

Going for the Finger-Licking Gusto

By NATHAN LEE

Published: May 9, 2008

It’s opening day at the new American Chicken Bunker, and, as might be expected of a fast-food restaurant built atop an American Indian burial ground, things are going to hell. Outside, a group of protesters led by the frequently topless Collegiate Lesbians Against Mega-Conglomerations (CLAM) vents its outrage at the perpetuators of the chicken holocaust.

Inside, Paco Bell (Khalid Rivera) has met with an “accident” while surreptitiously adding his own special sauce to a mélange of fetid chicken parts, and Carl Jr. (Caleb Emerson) is lethally impaled by a mop after attempting some hanky-panky with the reanimated corpse of a slimy roaster.

“The chicken,” shrieks the burqa-clad line cook Humus (Rose Ghavami), “has declared jihad on us all!”

Needless to say, “Poultrygeist: Night of the Chicken Dead” is not for every taste. But within the context of its genre — the satirical sexploitation zombie chicken gross-out musical extravaganza — it is just about as perfect as a film predicated on the joys of projectile vomiting and explosive diarrhea can be. Directed with finger-licking gusto by Lloyd Kaufman, the irrepressible co-founder of Troma Entertainment, “Poultrygeist” plays like a grindhouse analogue to the sloppy, psychosexual provocations of the performance artist Paul McCarthy and is, in its lowbrow way, every bit as liberating.

POULTRYGEIST

Night of the Chicken Dead

Opens on Friday in Manhattan.

Directed by Lloyd Kaufman; written by Gabriel Friedman, Dan Bova and Mr. Kaufman; director of photography, Brendan Flynt; edited by Mr. Friedman; music by Duggie Banas and Jason (Shack) Kozun; production designers, Alyssa Hill and Doug Markuson Jr.; produced by Andy Deemer and Kiel Walker; released by Troma Entertainment. At the Village East, Second Avenue at 12th Street, East Village. Running time: 1 hour 43 minutes. This film is not rated.

WITH: Jason Yachanin (Arbie), Kate Graham (Wendy), Allyson Sereboff (Micki), Robin L. Watkins (Gen. Lee Roy), Rose Ghavami (Humus), Khalid Rivera (Paco Bell) and Caleb Emerson (Carl Jr.).