Thomas M. Bresnahan - RIP

[Matt]

I'm sorry for your loss, Kevin.

Matt

[slide_advantage_redoux]

Kevin, I am sad to learn of your loss.

I am fortunate to still have my dad around, and I really count my blessings. He is quite active at 87 yrs old, and he is perhaps in better physical shape than I am. He is reads Depak Chopra, books on Yoga and he exercises every day, including 5 miles on an treadmill at the local senior center.

Yet unlike your father, I could never get my dad near a PC. (I did get my mom up and running, and she sells more on Ebay than I do.)

Even with all that, I know that he could go any time. This is true of us all. One never knows, do one? -_-

You wrote a terrific and touching tribute to a man you obviously loved very much. Thank you for sharing your thoughts.

[Ed S]

I've been mostly lurking for the past while, but had to come out of hibernation for this thread. As a participant of the first BNBB since 1997 or so, I guess I've "known" you for almost 10 years now. I am SO sorry to hear the news of your father's death Kevin. Your tribute to your dad really touched me. It is so apparent that you loved, respected and enjoyed your relationship with your father. That is such a wonderful thing.

I hope that the memories of your dad and your relationship with him give you the strength to deal with your loss and to continue your life with the wonderful memories that you and he created.

Best wishes to you and your family at this time of loss and reflection. It sounds like your dad was a really great guy. You are VERY lucky.

[paul secor]

Kevin, thanks for sharing memories and stories about your father. I went to a memorial service two weeks ago, and a son spoke for over half an hour about his father. When he finished, I felt that I had met his father and had spent time with him, even though neither was true. I had that feeling after reading what you wrote. You're lucky to have had a father like that.

[ASNL77]

Condolences to you and your loved ones, Kevin.

[Kevin Bresnahan]

First, thank you everyone for the kind words. It means a lot to me to read them.

The funeral was yesterday and I just got home from my Mom's place. It still feels weird saying "Mom's place".

Organissimo was well represented at the wake. Thanks Mike and Rob. I was stressed out but your visit helped me relax a little bit. In fact, when I spotted Rob, I did a double-take. It looked like Lew Tabackin was in front of him! Joanne said it was the first time she heard me laugh in two days.

Can you have a funny wake story?? Well, my Dad would appreciate a funny wake story, so I'm going to tell it!

There I was, all of these people, many whom I hadn't seen in decades, shaking my hand and telling me how sorry they were about my Dad. This younger-looking guy stops and says, "Hi, I'm Mike. Sorry about your father."

Well, I like to ask a few questions in case it might stir up a memory that will allow me to talk about my Dad, so I ask, "Mike? And your last name..."

And he says, with a bit of a raised eyebrow (I guess I was supposed to know him), "Mike Sullivan."

So I say, "And how did you know my Dad?"

He says, "I'm the mayor."

I was confused. I've been out of Holyoke for a long time and totally spaced out, so I say, "Of what?"

He says, "Of Holyoke! I'm the Mayor of Holyoke."

I started laughing... I couldn't help it. He started laughing too. The Mayor of Holyoke. He then told me he'd played golf with my Dad a few times and knew my Mom. My mother. She knows everyone! And anyone my mother didn't know played golf with my Dad!

At the wake, two of the guys that were helping my Dad restore his 1931 Indian 101 Scout stopped by to tell me that in honor of my Dad, they put the finishing touches on his bike. He almost finished it. Three of them worked on it for about 8 hours and finished it up. My Dad was trying to finish it to show it at an Indian event in Hebron, CT August 4th, 5th & 6th.

I told them I'd take the bike to the show with my Mom. It's the least I can do for my Dad. It's a sure-fire medal winner from what these guys say. My Dad's final masterpiece.

Well, enough rambling. Thanks again to you all for letting me do a little reminiscing here.

Later,

Kevin

[Eric]

Very touching, Kevin.

[Kevin Bresnahan]

One last bit of unfinished business of my Dad's - we put his 1931 Indian 101 Scout in for judging. It got a Junior First rating with a score of 90 points. It was tough to go to but I made it. Attached is a picture of me on the bike.

BTW, Mom wants nothing to do with these Indians so they're for sale.

Kevin

[Dan Gould]

[DukeCity]

I missed this thread when it was started, so please accept my belated condolences.

But the bike looks great, and I'm sure your dad would be pleased that it got finshed and had such a good showing!

[Kevin Bresnahan]

I was doing a search of forums for something about Bobby Hutcherson and this thread popped into the search results. Weird in that it doesn't mention Bobby but maybe it was a sign...

Amazingly, it's already been 10 years since my father died. I still miss him like hell. I've been thinking about him recently too. As we prepare to move out of our NH house to head to the shores of Maine, I am finding things that I have to remove that my Dad helped my install. One was a clasp that he rigged up to hold my wire wine racks to the basement walls. As I said, Dad could fix anything. Often, he figured out ways to get things to work that most people would've just given up on. For many of his unique fixes, he used what he would call an "old indian trick" (Dad meant Native American Indian here).

Here's one of his old indian tricks...

You find a wood screw where the hole is stripped. Screw won't hold. Usually happens to door jambs and latches. The old indian trick? Get some wooden toothpicks and stuff them into the stripped hole. Snap them off so they're just below the surface. Drive wood screw back into hole. Fixed. Worst case, you may have to add some wood glue to the toothpick pieces before inserting them.

If you're using this trick right now to fix that latch plate in the hallway closet door, you're welcome.

[mikeweil]

I knew that trick, but still a nice and moving story. 

[Ted O'Reilly]

9 hours ago, Kevin Bresnahan said:

....The old indian trick? Get some wooden toothpicks and stuff them into the stripped hole. Snap them off so they're just below the surface. Drive wood screw back into hole....

I didn't realise that Old Indians had toothpicks and wood screws! 

[Kevin Bresnahan]

4 hours ago, Ted O'Reilly said:

I didn't realise that Old Indians had toothpicks and wood screws! 

And now you get my Dad!! He was funny as hell.

He had some "old indian tricks" on his computer too.

[Hardbopjazz]

My  condolences, Kevin.

[Kevin Bresnahan]

On 8/17/2016 at 8:11 PM, Hardbopjazz said:

My  condolences, Kevin.

Thank you. As I said, even though it's been 10 years already, I still miss the guy. Even crazier, I still grab the telephone every now & then with the intention of calling him, I usually call Mom when that happens.

Edited August 18, 2016 by Kevin Bresnahan

[danasgoodstuff]

I don't know how I missed this v. touching thread before.  My dad's been gone 6 years and just this morning I was thinking what would he think about an NYR review of a book by Chomsky.  All my best to you and yours.

[Kevin Bresnahan]

5 hours ago, danasgoodstuff said:

I don't know how I missed this v. touching thread before.  My dad's been gone 6 years and just this morning I was thinking what would he think about an NYR review of a book by Chomsky.  All my best to you and yours.

Yeah, that happens to me too. My Dad was a huge Boston Bruins fan and every time they are in the news, I wonder what he would think of it.

[Kevin Bresnahan]

Yesterday I was installing a bike hanger in my garage. I needed to drive the screws deep into a stud. I used my cordless drill and stripped a Philips-head screw. Then I stripped another one. Even using variable speed, the damn thing kept stripping screws. After 3 or 4, I dug through a bunch of old screws in one of my dad's coffee cans full of screws and found 2 flat head wood screws. Big suckers. Then I went to the bottom of my toolbox and pulled out this monster flat head screwdriver that my dad gave me years ago. A little grunting and voila, installed.

Thanks dad.

[Brad]

On 8/18/2016 at 3:24 PM, danasgoodstuff said:

I don't know how I missed this v. touching thread before.  My dad's been gone 6 years and just this morning I was thinking what would he think about an NYR review of a book by Chomsky.  All my best to you and yours.

I don’t know how I missed it either. I know it’s 16 years later but my condolences. My father died when he was 56, too young for both yours and mine. 

[danasgoodstuff]

7 hours ago, Brad said:

I don’t know how I missed it either. I know it’s 16 years later but my condolences. My father died when he was 56, too young for both yours and mine. 

I'd almost forgotten about this thread, but then it all came back.  Think about my dad, and how full of it he thought Chomsky was about language, all the time.  I'm sure you guys think about yours all the time too.  And about fishing with him and how it wasn't really about fishing but about doing stuff together.  And lots of other random things that remind me of my dad and my brother and all the things we did, mostly in SK.  And how lucky I am to have my wife and our daughter now.

[jazzbo]

I've missed my Dad for nearly six months now. He was the most intelligent and wise person I've ever known and I managed to become a good son to him but also a good friend the last nine years. I still talk to him everyday as I had done these last years; I still think of him with happiness. What a man!

[Teasing the Korean]

My Dad has been gone for more than 30 years.  We shared music in common.  When a pianist or arranger used an interesting chord substitution, we would intuitively make eye contact, both thinking the same thing.  One of my last musical memories was riding in the car with him listening to an early Randy Weston album on a cassette.  I remember we had pulled into the garage just when "Again" started.  I said, "Wait, you have to hear this."  And we sat in the parked car listening to Randy Weston play "Again" without saying a word.

[Kevin Bresnahan]

My mom held on for almost 17 years after my dad died back in 2006. Last week she fell and hit her head. She did not recover and died this morning at the age of 85, just two weeks shy of her 86th birthday.

I'm still a bit bummed out right now so I can't give her a write up like I did my dad. For now, let's just say my gregarious nature is definitely from my mother.

[John L]

I'm very sorry, Kevin.   😢  My condolences to you and the family. 

John